


Hat Creek Trouble

by BryceWrites



Category: Lonesome Dove (US)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Time Travel, Country & Western, Drama & Romance, Eventual Romance, F/M, Kate & Leopold - Freeform, M/M, Minor Character Death, Multi, Past Rape/Non-con, Rape/Non-con Elements, Romance, Time Travel, Western, kinda crossover, time traveling
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-04-10
Updated: 2015-04-14
Packaged: 2018-03-22 05:21:20
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 13
Words: 41,169
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3716674
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BryceWrites/pseuds/BryceWrites
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>After a twist of fate and a brave jump from a fire escape, Selene ends up in 1877 on a cattle ranch in Montana. Dressed in her gear from 2014, can she fit in with the cowboys and manage to get back home? Time traveling, western struggles, and romance ensues.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. The One About Time Traveling

The alarm that blared through the room made me groan and roll over. I made three attempts of throwing my arm to turn it off, before I knocked it off my night stand. It kept ringing incessantly until it just stopped suddenly. The silence made me pick my head up. “You’re going to be late for work, hon.”

That was Gerald, my homosexual, African-American roommate. “Thanks for making it stop, Gerry.” I said, burying my head under my pillow.

“Selena Marie. Get your cutie-pa-tootie out of bed this instant!” Gerry said and I heard him stomp his foot. He was getting serious. I groaned and sat up in bed.

“Where are you going so early?” I asked, seeing Gerry in a silk button up and a pair of salmon skinny jeans. He woke me up early, as I had to be at work at 9:30 and he didn’t have work until noon most days. He only wore this on a first date. He told me if a guy couldn’t accept his skinny jeans, he couldn’t accept him.

“I have a coffee date.” He grinned, yanking on my arm and making me stumble out of bed and towards the coffee pot.

“A coffee date? Who has coffee dates?” I mumbled, pouring myself a cup of the brew that Gerry had been kind enough to make for me.

“You’ve been out of the dating scene too long. I’m gonna set you up with one of Omar’s friends.” Gerry said, shaking his head while putting his hands on his hips. Omar was one of Gerry’s straight friends. However, I had heard the stories about the guys Omar set Gerry up with.

Now, Gerry and I are exact opposites. I’m a hopeless romantic at heart. I had a couple of past boyfriends. None of them were what I wanted, or needed out of a man. Gerry, on the other hand, went on several dates a week. He just wanted to love and be loved; which never bothered me. I just wasn’t that kind of girl.

“Gerry…” I groaned, taking a gulp of my coffee.

He crossed his arms at me. “Don’t ‘Gerry’ me. You need to get out there. Mr. Right isn’t gonna just fall into your lap.” I gave him a pouty look as I stumbled back into my bedroom. “Oh, and I knew you’d be late, so I already picked out your outfit for today.” He smiled at me.

I looked over at my vanity. There sat my days outfit. A white tee shirt, black vest, well-worn boot cut jeans, with my red high heels. “You’re the best.” I said, kissing him on the cheek.

“I know. I’m off. I’ll bring you lunch.” He grinned, leaving me to change.

 

* * *

 

 

I had been at work for almost four hours before Gerry came by to bring my lunch. I never asked him to, but he always did when he could. If he wasn’t gay, he’d be the love of my life. I worked as an un-interesting secretary at an un-interesting law office in an un-interesting office building.

Gerry burst through the elevator doors of the 6th floor I worked on. I gestured to the headset I was wearing so Gerry knew I was on the phone.

“Yes, sir, I understand why you’re getting this legal notice, but sir, there’s nothing I can do about it. If you’ll give me just a moment, I’ll transfer you to your lawyer.” And before he could protest, I clicked mute and transferred him to the lawyer he’d yell at next.

I gave a heaving sigh and turned to Gerry, feeling more exhausted than normal. “There’s a secretarial position available at the office.” He called it ‘the office’, but he was a fashion designer. They didn’t have ‘offices’, they had studios. “Pay?” I asked.

“Same as here, but girl, you know you’ll have less stress. Peanut butter and nutella on honey oat with baked potato chips.” Gerry said, explaining my lunch.

I stood up and leaned over the counter. I threw my arms around him, giving him the biggest hug I could manage. I wasn’t bothered at all about the looks I was getting from some of the lawyers and clients. “Tori, I’m off to lunch. Back in 30.” I called, throwing off my headset and running around the counter.

Gerry smiled at me as we linked arms and strolled out of the building and down the street to a local park. We sat on a park bench and dug into our lunch. “So, how’d the coffee date go?”

He gave a long, dramatic sigh and I was all prepared to give the “There are other fish in the sea,” speech. “It was amazing! Oh my goodness! He’s perfect! First, he complimented my jeans.” He all but shrieked. I smiled as he continued. “He’s so muscular and handsome. He has the cutest little sideways smile.”

I giggled as Gerry described him. I always did. It somehow humored me to hear a man described like that, from another man. “I’m glad, Gerry.” I said, taking a bite of my sandwich.

“We’re having dinner tomorrow. You want to come?” He offered.

“Gerry…” I didn’t need to say anymore. He understood this as my “I hate being a third wheel on your gay dates” statement. “I was just offering!” He exclaimed, eating a fork full of Cesar salad. I stared off into the distance. I could have sworn I saw a man duck behind a tree when I turned to look. But I was just hallucinating. I had been doing this for about a month.

First, it started with a dream. I was standing on top of a tall building wearing an old style dress, like the ones the Pioneers wore. Everything was in a shade of gray, so I couldn’t tell the color of anything. The dress was pretty, but it was pouring rain and blowing wind.

It was odd because I was wearing my neon converse. A man stood behind me, calling my name. I was crying and looking down at the ground. I kept yelling at him, “I’m sorry. I’m sorry.” But I could never see all of his face.

Just his eyes; brown as melted chocolate.

“…Lena?” Gerry called, breaking my trance. I shook my head, looking over at him. He looked concerned. He only called me Lena when he was worried about me.

“I’m fine.” I told him, eating more of my sandwich.

“Dreams again?” He asked. He was the only one I had told about them. And the only reason I had told him was because he woke me from it and I was crying.

“Nah.” I said, going back to my sandwich. He knew I was lying, but he didn’t push it.

 

* * *

I slammed shut the door to our apartment. “I freaking hate work! Lawyers just think they’re the hottest pieces of ass on earth!” I yelled in whatever direction Gerry was. We had a habit of doing this on days we were stressed. Today was my day. I leaned on the counter and took off my heels, tossing them in the direction of my room. “And I swear to God, if that jerk from accounting gives me one more speech on sexual harassment while he’s staring at my boobs-“ I paused as I came around the corner into the living area.

I almost fell over sideways. Gerry smiled up at me. He was cuddled on the couch with a big, hunky black man. The man looked a little uncomfortable. “Selena, this is James. My new lawyer boyfriend.”

“Oh. Oh my god, Gerry. I’m so, so sorry. I-I d-didn’t mean t-that-” I paused myself. I stuttered when I was nervous. I slapped myself on the hand to calm myself down. “Hi, I’m Selene. I didn’t mean the whole lawyer thing.”

This seemed to put him a little as ease. “I understand how some people can be. It’s nice to meet you. James.” He smiled, standing up to shake my hand.

“Hi. Again.” I said awkwardly as he sat down. “Ok, well, since I’m interrupting, I’m goin’ to go see if Figgy McGee’s is open.” I said as I walked into my room to pull on my neon converse. “You two have a great evening.”

I didn’t usually drink when I went to Figgy McGee’s, the Irish inspired pub down the block. But the head bartender was a big, grizzly looking teddy bear of a man that took pity on me for having a gay roommate, so he let me eat at half price and watch TV. And if I sat at the bar, he protected me from drunken idiots.

“The usual?” Danny, the head bartender asked.

“Yes, please.” I said, putting my purse on the bar. On his way to the kitchen, Danny took my purse and set it behind the bar for me. I smiled my thanks and turned to watch the football game that was on the big screen. I usually ended up here on Fridays anyway. I liked watching the football games, despite the fact I had no idea how to play.

Tonight’s game was the Packers vs. the Bears. I watched the game off and on until my food arrived. “Thanks Danny.” I said, as he set a plate of fish and chips in front of me, with a glass of sweet tea. He went back to bartending and not long after that, a hand touched my shoulder. I yelped and jumped.

Gerry held up his hands. “Why are you so jumpy?” He asked, sitting on the bar stool next to me. “Just zoning out.” I said, taking a drink of my tea. “James went home. Come back to the apartment and regale me of the tales of the heartless lawyer-beasts.” He smiled.

I asked Danny for my purse and pulled out a twenty. I kneeled up onto the barstool, gave him a peck on the cheek and headed for the door. Danny smiled at me as we left, clearing away my dishes.

 

* * *

 

 

Gerry and I sat on the couch in our PJs. There was a bucket of ice cream in front of me and a tub of homemade popcorn in front of Gerry. “…And then,” I was continuing my story from earlier. “He kept staring at my boobs. Who gives somebody a lecture on sexually harassing someone, while sexually harassing someone?”

“Men that want your body.” Gerry giggled. I rolled my eyes. Gerry frequently like to act like a middle school girl. I opened my mouth to argue with him, but the computer in his room blinked red and beeped loudly. Gerry set down his popcorn and I followed him into his room. He sat at his desk and put on his glasses. I smiled at him as he clicked away on his computer.

Gerry adored fashion. He had a passion for it. But what he loved to do in his spare time was physics. “There’s a huge storm system coming into the area.” He told me. Gerry’s dream was time travel. He wanted to be the first to figure it out, completely. I was actually his guinea pig a few times. He didn’t even have to talk me into it.

“Come here.” Gerry said, taking hold of my hand and tugging me onto his lap. Most of the time I didn’t understand what he was talking about, but he still wanted me to know what was going on. “You see this?” Gerry asked, pointing to a cloud formation on the screen.

“Yeah?” It was more of a question then anything. It was just a cloud to me.

“There hasn’t been a cloud formation like this anywhere in the United States since 2001.” He said, looking at me, hoping I could fill in the blanks.

“That’s when Stuart Besser wrote about that girl in New York going back in time. Kate…. McKay?” I asked. He nodded, waiting for me to continue. “Stuart claimed he had brought back some guy, Leopold, from a hundred years ago. Kate ended up falling in love with Leopold and when he went back to 18th century New York, she followed him through the wormhole or whatever.”

“I knew I loved you for a reason.” He grinned, hugging me tightly. I hugged him back and he went at typing around me. “Go get dressed.”

“Excuse me?” I asked.

“Go get dressed. Please?”

Oh. Right. I was the guinea pig again. 

I came out of my room a few minutes later in my jeans, my neon converse, a t-shirt and my hoodie. Gerry would try to talk me into something nicer, but it was raining outside. I wanted to be comfortable if I landed two hundred years in the past.

Gerry looked me over and decided not to argue with my fashion choice. “Ok, we have exactly seven minutes and 32 seconds.” He said, setting the timer of his watch. “We’ll only have a two minute opening before it passes by us. And, if by chance, this is the wormhole to the past, we have...” More keyboard clinking. “Twelve days to get you back.”

I nodded. I was always a little nervous when he went into scientist mode. He was much more fun in fashion-friendly-gay mode. He looked up at me and smiled. “It’ll be fine. It’s probably nothing.” He said. And what he meant was, ‘the chances of you time traveling are one billion to one.’

He led me out to the living room. “Ok, so I’m gonna need you to stand on the fire escape. We have a small window, but I’m going to talk you through everything.” He said, his hands on my shoulders. He was trying to comfort me, but this wasn’t how I pictured spending my Friday night.

He moved to the window that led to the fire escape and pulled it open. I took a breath and climbed out onto the cold metal. The rain was coming. No wind thankfully. I had a flashback to the dream I had been having for a month. I turned back to Gerry and I knew he could see the concern on my face. “I’m scared.” I said. I had to say it loud, for the rain quickly picked up.

“I know. But guess what?” He said, smiling at me. “What?” I asked nervously. “I love you, Selena Marie.” He said, pulling me in for a hug. I hugged him back and he led me over to the edge of the railing. I looked down at the dumpster that was two stories below the fire escape. Normally we did this at other places. I had never dived off our fire escape before.

“What if it doesn’t work?” I asked, as he helped me over the railing so I stood against it. Gerry held onto my waist.

“Then I guess I’ll fish you out of the garbage.” He laughed. His watch beeped, signaling I was clear for launch. “Alright, are you ready?” He asked.

I was shaking with fear. “Do I have a choice?” Gerry laughed. He knew I wanted to do this; I was just being a chicken. “You better fish me out ASAP.” I said, taking a deep breath and pushing away from the railing.

 

* * *

My head hit something hard and I figured I’d hit the side of the dumpster. It was still raining and the cold water pounded on my face. The wind was blowing, which was weird. But as I sat up, I found I wasn’t lying in our dumpster, two stories below our fire escape.

I was lying in a field of thick grass, in a little outcrop of trees. Uselessly, I pulled the hood of my hoodie over my head, hoping to shield my eyes from some of the downcast water. I stood and looked around, hoping to see something I could head for, even if it was a cave.

There, about two hundred yards away, I could see a light through the rain. I put my hand up, in an attempt to cover my eyes. I started walking, concentrating on the light. When I came to a wooden fence, I squeezed through the logs. I stumbled a few times from the wind. By the time I reached the front porch of the cabin, I was covered in mud and soaked to the bone.

I banged on the door as my teeth started chattering together. An older man opened the door, looking confused.

“I’m lost. Can I come in to wait out the storm?” I barely managed and he nodded, moving aside to let me in. The cabin housed five men, besides the one that let me into the house. I couldn’t stop my teeth chattering and my hands were shaking so bad I couldn’t hold them still. I didn’t realize how cold I was until one of the other men handed me a blanket to wrap around my shoulders. “I appreciate the hospitality.” I said, pulling off my wet jacket before I wrapped the blanket around me.

“You’re a long way from town, Miss.” The older man said and I took in his appearance. White hair, thinning on top. His beard and mustache were the same color.  He wore clothes that made me think of pioneers, of real cowboys. So did all the other men in the room. And here I was in neon converse. Great.

I nodded, realizing I hadn’t answered him yet. “Yeah, kind of figured.” I said.

“What’s your name ma’am?” He asked me.

“Selene McCrae.” I told him, holding out my hand.

“Captain Woodrow F. Call.” He said, giving my hand a brief shake after an odd look in my direction. “This here’s Pea Eye Parker, Jasper Fant, Dish Boggett Needle Nelson, and Newt Dobbs.”

“Well, Mr. Call. I really appreciate you and your men taking me in. I’m not sure how, but I got turned around in the storm.” I said, trying to calm my shaking.

“If you don’t mind me sayin’, ma’am, it’s awful silly to be traveling in this kind of weather.” He told me.

“Well, my traveling companion said the weather wouldn’t be so bad.” I said, feeling my chest tighten a little bit from the cold.

“Ma’am, I think it best if you sat in front of the fire and warm up some.” The man to my right said.

I wasn’t in a mood to argue with him, so I nodded, sitting on the wood planks in front of the rock fireplace. I held my hands out, embracing the warmth the fire gave off.

“Is your companion still out there?” Woodrow asked.

“I’m not quite sure. I’d figure he found some form of shelter. We got separated.” I told him, trying to come up with an explanation of my jeans.

“Ma’am, what’s wrong with your shoes?” Newt asked, pointing to the rainbow colored garments on my feet.

I tried to tuck them under my legs, but everyone else had seen them too. I had no good explanation as to why my shoes were six different colors. “I, uh, think it best that I go now.” I said, handing the blanket back to Newt and grabbing my jacket.

Woodrow stepped in front of the door as I pulled on my wet jacket. “Now, ma’am. I can’t rightly let a woman go out in the rain like this.”

“Captain Call, I appreciate your concern in the same light I appreciate your letting me warm up. But I think it’d be best if I go on my way now.” I said, trying to step around him, but he didn’t move.

“Ma’am. I’d appreciate it if you’d sit down and warm yourself more.” Woodrow said, nodding towards the fire.

“Captain Call, I can’t explain my clothes to you in a way that doesn’t sound crazy. And I figure you won’t believe what I do tell you either. So if you just let me leave, I think it’d be best for both of us.” I told him.

Still, he didn’t move an inch. “Ma’am.” He said, in a tone I associated with talking to children. “Sit and warm yourself.”

Accepting the fact he wasn’t going to let me leave, I sat back down at the fire.

“You’d warm faster if you got that wet coat off ya.” Newt said, his eyes slightly downcast.

I thought about it for a moment before pulling my jacket off again. He held out the blanket to me and I thanked him, wrapping it around my shoulders again. I scooted as close to the fire as I could get without burning myself.

The cabin was so quiet, I almost forgot there was six sets of eyes watching me. “I’m not gonna just vanish, ya know.” I called over my shoulder and there was a couple rustling sounds made.

“Ma’am, if ya don’t mind me asking; how’d you get up here? We’re an awful long ways from the city.” Newt said.

I squinted into the fire, like it held the answers to my questions. “Honestly, I don’t know. One minute, I was talking with my friend and the next I was laying in a field and it was raining.”

“Well, that couldn’t have been, ma’am. It’s been raining clear since yesterday.” Newt said.

I looked over at him for a minute, then his eyes were downcast again. “Then, I guess I don’t remember.” I said quietly, feeling the cold in my bones now.

“Jasper, go out to the barn and get Clara’s spare clothes. We should get the miss out of her wet things.” Woodrow said and I heard one of the guys say ‘yes sir’ as they pulled on boots and left the cabin.

When he came back, Woodrow told me they’d move their bed things out to the barn so I could have the cabin. I told them they didn’t need to, but Woodrow insisted. So when they all left the cabin, I quickly shed my wet t-shirt and pants, keeping on my underwear and bra and pulled on the dress and over shirt I’d been given.

I was about to sit back in front of the fire when there was a knock at the door. “You decent?” Woodrow asked.

“Yes, sir.” I called back and the door opened to reveal him and Newt.

“We just came to check on you, ma’am.” Newt said, seeming to trip over his words.

“I’m fine, thank you. You didn’t have to kick your men out of your own cabin. I could have slept in the barn just fine.” I told Woodrow, feeling guilty for the intrusion.

“Nonsense.” He said, sternly. “A woman wandering around in the dark, by herself while it’s raining. Couldn’t rightly let you sleep with the horses. My boys are used to it.”

“You’re being very generous to me, Captain Call.” I said, looking up at him.

He nodded, obviously not sure what to say. “If it’s all the same to you, ma’am, I’ll be sleeping on the porch. For your safety and for that of my boys’.” He told me.

I nodded. “Of course.”

He nodded once more, then opened the door again and him and Newt took their leave. I was left in the cabin by myself. It was incredibly odd. The cabin wasn’t built to any standards, I thought. When the wind blew, it made a whistling sound through the cabin and the roof leaked in a few places.

I huddled by the fireplace, figuring I wouldn’t be getting much sleep.


	2. The One with the Dancing

It had taken me a few hours to fall asleep on the bedroll Woodrow had left for me. I wasn’t used to sleeping on the floor. When I woke up, there wasn’t a shred of light outside and the fire had almost died. I grabbed a piece of wood and set it on top of the fire, then blew gently until it caught hold of the log.

After it was blazing a bit more, I added another log. I went to the front window, but couldn’t see anything. The rain had stopped sometime in the middle of the night. The light that had been on the porch last night had gone out and the sun was still far behind the horizon. I went back to the fire, trying to chase the chill from the room.

I’d added one more log as the sky went from a hazy gray to a very soft pink. I wasn’t sure what I was doing, but the cabin was starting to make me claustrophobic. My shoes had dried pretty well, so I pulled them on and took the blanket Newt had given me last night and wrapped around my shoulders.

As quietly as I could, I walked over to the door and cracked it open. I could hardly see the outline of Woodrow’s body on the porch, just off to the side of the door. I opened it and stepped out, gently pulling it closed. I tip-toed down the stairs and hit the dirt before anything happened.

“Little early for a walk, ma’am.” Woodrow’s voice came, scaring the crap out of me.

“Yeah, well. I just thought I’d just some fresh air.” I said weakly.

Woodrow threw off his blankets, slid on his boots, picked up his hat and rifle, and came to stand near me. “Best if I come with ya then. Lots of animals in these woods.” He said, cradling the rifle.

“Were you in the Army, Captain?” I asked after we’d walked for a while.

“No, ma’am. Texas Rangers.” He said simply.

“Well, Captain. I believe we’re quite a ways from Texas.” I said, hoping I was right. I didn’t exactly know where the hell we were, but I didn’t know of many forests as thick as this one in Texas.

“Yes, ma’am.” Woodrow said.

“So how’d you end up all the way up here from Texas?” I asked as we walked at a slow pace.

“I reckon it was Gus’s idea, ma’am. He decided Montana would be as good a place as any for a cattle ranch.” Woodrow told me.

“Is Gus not here?” I asked, trying to remember the names of the men I was introduced to last night.

“No, ma’am. He died of the blood poisoning about the time we reached this valley.” Woodrow said, but I could see there was a sorrow under his blank features.

I nodded. “I’m sorry for your loss.”

We walked for another ten or fifteen minutes until the sun crested the mountains and the whole valley was basked in orange light. “You’ve made a beautiful home here for these men, Captain Call.” I told him.

He just barely tipped his hat. “If you don’t mind me asking, ma’am,” He said, pausing for a moment. “I reckon I’d like to know the story of those shoes.”

I swallowed the lump in my throat. “Well, Captain. I’m not from around here. I’ve never been to Montana before. Yesterday, I was at work at the lawyer’s office. Yesterday evening, I was at my apartment in Denver, with my roommate.  Today, I’m in Montana on a cattle ranch.” I said with a shrug. “I don’t know how I got here. I don’t even know what year it is.”

He stopped walking and looked over at me. “Ma’am, I ain’t a man to call a lady a liar. But I believe you about as far as I can throw you.”

I nodded. “That’s understandable.” I told him, thinking. “When I left Denver, yesterday, the year was 2014.” I told him, trying to gauge his reaction.

He stood still for a moment, mimicking a statue. Then slowly turned his head to look at me. “That ain’t rightly possible, seeing as its 1877 now.”

I blinked. I had been sent back almost a hundred and fifty years to the past. But why? I was confused. Gerry once said that when time traveling is successful, the time warp sends you to a time where it needs you to fix something. But didn’t it only take you back in time, at the spot where you were? But how would I know. I hadn’t seen Back to the Future in a long time. Maybe time travel just took you wherever the hell it wanted to.

“We best get you back to the cabin.” Woodrow said and we wandered back to the house to see Woodrow’s men sitting around on the porch. “We wasn’t sure if you was still sleeping, so we figured we’d just sit here.” Pea Eye said, taking off his hat when he saw me.

I wasn’t sure what to say back to him, so I just smiled. I opened the cabin door and went to put another log on the fire. Woodrow and Needle went about getting breakfast ready and I just sat on the floor, watching them.

“Did you sleep alright, ma’am?” Newt said, coming to stand a few feet from me.

I smiled up at him. “Yes, I did. Thank you.”

He smiled and nodded, then turned to find something else to do. Newt made me smile a little bit. He’d obviously not had much interaction with women.  I could tell he’d had some, but it was pretty obvious that none of these men were married.

Woodrow said that breakfast was ready and suddenly, all the men looked at me. “Come get breakfast.” He said again, looking directly at me. With Newt’s help, I stood from the floor. I wasn’t used to getting around in a dress. Fried eggs, bacon, biscuits and coffee. I poured a cup of coffee, then got a biscuit and a couple pieces of bacon.

I sat at one of the seven chairs around the table and waited for the rest of the men to it down before I took a bite.

“Why’d ya wait for us?” Newt asked, curiously.

I shrugged. “My parents always told me you never eat until everybody’s at the table.”

He nodded and dug into his food. It took about ten minutes before the boys finished their food and they all took their plates to the tub in the corner. Then they grabbed their hats and went out the door to the stables.

I looked over at Woodrow and tried to remember something about the old west I’d learned in History class in high school a few years ago. “I, um,” I started, wondering how to put my thoughts into words. “I don’t expect you to let me stay here for nothing. And it doesn’t look like any of your men are married, which tells me you don’t have a woman around. I can cook and clean; do dishes and laundry.” I told him.

“I’m not good with horses much, so if you wanted me to help with any of that, you’d have to train me along the way.  But I can cook and bake, mostly. I’m good at laundry and dishes. I can clean and tend the fire.” I told him.

He watched me carefully. “Can you make biscuits?”

I thought about it for a moment. “Not… not off the top of my head.”

He just stood there for a moment. “Best get those dishes done. Don’t have a wash room, so you’ll have to do them in the lake.” He said, grabbing his hat and leaving the cabin.

I nodded to myself and put another log on the fire, to chase the chill from the cabin. I rolled up the sleeves of the dress Woodrow had given me and picked up the metal tub with the dishes in it. The weather today was gloomy and overcast, but I could tell most of the rain had moved away from us. We might get some sprinkling later, but it wouldn’t be bad enough to worry about.

I hiked the tub on my hip as I opened and closed the door. A few of the men were rounding up a stray cow, while the Captain and Pea Eye were putting a fence back together from the storm. I zoned out the guys as I started humming to myself on the walk to the lake.

It wasn’t too far from the cabin, but just far enough away, that if the lake flooded, the house wasn’t in danger. It was a pretty good idea; not that I knew anything about building a house. When I got to the lake shore, I kneeled down and pulled the dishes out of the tub.

I figured I could wash the dishes, rinse them in the lake, then rinse out the tub. Despite my general lack of knowledge of the Old West, my plan didn’t work out too badly. I couldn’t get the plates as clean as I would have liked, but I figured they were cleaner than they’d been in a while.

After I had finished washing the dishes, I scrubbed on the tub for a minute before dumping the water out. I stacked the plates in the tub and carried them back to the house. I then took the plates out of the tub and stacked them on the shelf on top of the wood range.

Then I saw that the fire was slowly dying out. I added two more logs before I realized we were almost out of wood in the house. I sighed, rolling down my sleeves. My parents had lived in the country when I was younger, before I decided to try my hand at Denver. I didn’t do too bad, but I always hated collecting wood for the fire place.

As I opened the door, Newt stood there, acting surprised. “Newt.” I said, with a small nod.

“Ma’am.” He said, sliding his cowboy hat off his head. “Captain Call asked me to come see if you needed help with anything.”

“Um,” I said, thinking about it. “I suppose you could help me bring some wood in.” I said.

“Yes, ma’am.” He said, putting his hat back on his head. He turned the corner of the deck and picked an arm full of firewood, then walked around me. I grabbed another arm full and followed him into the house.

Without thinking about it, I had started humming. It was so hard for me to work without music, that sometimes I made my own music.

Newt stopped and looked around, like he heard something.

“What’s wrong?” I asked, suddenly worried.

“I heard a funny sound.” He said.

I looked at him oddly, then it donned on me. I hummed a few bars and he looked around wildly. I gave a little laugh as I took Newt’s arm full of wood. “I was humming, Newt. It’s ok.” I told him, setting his arm load in the corner.

“Ma’am, what’s humming?” He asked.

I turned to him, confused. “You don’t hum randomly?” I asked him.

“No, ma’am. Can’t say I do.” He said, suddenly looking uncomfortable.

“Oh, well.” I said. “It’s a noise you make. Like singing, but without the words.” I told him.

He just watched me. I hummed along with a radio that played in my head. He tilted his head to the side a little bit. “How do ya do that?”

I thought about it for a moment, not sure how to explain it. “Um, it’s like singing without opening your mouth.”

“I don’t reckon I sing much either.” He said, looking slightly embarrassed.

“Oh, Newt. That’s just fine.” I told him with a smile. “Not everybody does it. Like not everybody dances.” I said with a shrug.

“Don’t dance much neither.” He said.

I smiled at him and set my hand on his arm. “I could teach you if you’d like. After you’re done working for the day.” I said, as I saw Woodrow walking around outside the window.

He smiled a little. “I expect I’d like that very much.”

I smiled. “My little brother didn’t know how to dance either, but I taught him. And if I can teach him, you’ll get the hang of it in no time.”

He smiled and ducked his head, a little red starting in his cheeks. “Well, thank ya ma’am.” He said.

“I have to go talk to Woodrow.” I said, with one last smile in his direction as I left the cabin. Woodrow was on top of a brown and white paint. I wasn’t good with horses, but I at least could tell a buckskin from a paint or a dappled gray. “Captain, could I talk to you for a second?” I asked him.

“Suppose so.” He said, never looking down at me; always looking at the men or the forest or the lake.

“I have a request.” I said, which made him look down at me, but he didn’t say anything. “I was going to request that you let me stay in the barn and move your men back into the house.”

“Ain’t much heat in the barn for a lady.” He said, returning his gaze to above my head.

“I just need an extra blanket and I’ll be fine.” I told him. “I feel guilty for your men staying in the barn.”

“No need.” He said simply.

“Captain, would you mind maintaining eye contact with me for longer than a few seconds?” I asked, getting slightly irritated.

He sighed loudly then turned his gaze downwards to look me in the eye.

“Let me sleep in the barn.” I said.

“Can’t rightly do that.” He told me.

“Why am I fighting you for the drafty barn covered in straw?” I asked, gesturing to the structure to my left.

“Ain’t right for a lady to sleep in a place with no heat.” He told me.

“Captain Call. I’m a stranger you took into your home at a moment’s notice. The least I can do is give you back the cabin that has heat in it.” I said.

Woodrow shook his head and looked displeased. “Ain’t lettin’ ya stay in the barn if there ain’t heat there.” He said, then looked over at Dish, Newt and Pea Eye. “Dish, Pea Eye, saddle your horses. Best see if we can find Miss McCrae’s traveling companion. Newt, you’re in charge. Keep an eye on the Miss.” And Woodrow trotted off, up the hill to a patch of trees overlooking the other side of the hill.

Newt came to stand next to me.

“He’s an awful stubborn man.” I said, looking after Woodrow.

Newt nodded. “Yes, ma’am.”

I sighed. “Do you need help with anything?” I asked him.

“Uh, no ma’am. I just gotta fix the shoe on Jasper’s horse.” He said.

“Can I help with that?” I asked.

“If you’d like, ma’am.” He said.

I smiled, putting my arm around his elbow as he led the way to the barn. Right away, him and Jasper went to work taking off the old shoe, that had been bent by something and putting the new one on. When Newt and Jasper started, the horse started trying to move away.

“Hey, now. Shush.” I said as it made a noise. You could tell it was nervous.

“Thought you said you weren’t good with horses?” Jasper said.

“I don’t remember telling you that, Mr. Fant.” I said as I stroked the side of the horse’s neck.

“Well, I wasn’t… I didn’t…” He sputtered out.

“I’m not usually good with horses. I’m sure they can tell that they make me nervous.” I said, as the horse calmed down a bit.

“Well, Dixon doesn’t seem to make you nervous.” Newt said.

“Well, I’m not riding Dixon. I’m standing on the same ground as him.” I said, stroking his neck again.

“Why do horses make you nervous, ma’am?” Newt asked as he finished the shoe.

I shrugged. “Never rode them much except for a few summers when I was a kid.”

Jasper made a noise halfway between and cough and a laugh, making me look at him. “Never rode horses much.” He said. “What kinda person doesn’t ride horses?”

Jasper was starting to get on my nerves. And his voice was getting worse the more he talked. I crossed my arms in front of my chest and stood directly in front of him. “Me, that’s who. Do you have a problem with that, Mr. Fant?” I asked.

Jasper began sputtering an apology that meant nothing. Newt stood up, pointing his finger at Jasper and opening his mouth to come to my rescue.

I held my hand up to stop Jasper and he looked uncomfortable as Newt stalled in his surge forward. “I see you normally get away with being indirectly rude. That’s fine. But you point that attitude in my direction again, I’ll box your nose so fast, you won’t feel it ‘til you hit the ground. Am I understood?”

Jasper now looked thoroughly embarrassed as Needle came to stand near us. “Yes, ma’am.” He said quietly as he tipped his hat.

Newt had a funny smile on his face.

“How about lunch? It’s probably time for a little break.” I said, taking a glance around.

“Yes ma’am.” Newt said, holding his elbow out for me.

I smiled and took it as we led the group inside for lunch. We hadn’t eaten the whole pan of biscuits, so thankfully, I didn’t have to make more. But then we heated up ham and beans on the wood range. “How long do you think Captain Call will be gone?” I asked.

“Couple days, possible.” Needle Nelson said with a shrug.

I nodded. I felt bad with him wasting time and energy, looking for a man that wasn’t out there.

After lunch, the men went back to work. There wasn’t any food left over, so I didn’t have to figure out how to save it. I gathered the plates in the tub and took them back down the lake to wash them.

I finished with the dishes and tidying up the cabin by the time the boys called it quits for the day. Despite the chill that hung in the air from the overcast day, the boys were all sweaty and tired.

Newt came up to me and looked a little shy, wringing the brim of his hat. “Ma’am, if you don’t mind,” He said, pausing for a minute. “I think I’d like that lesson now.”

“What lesson?” Jasper barked, before shrinking at the look I gave him.

“Newt told me he didn’t know how to dance. So I said I’d show him. I’d show you too, if you don’t give me no lip.” I said.

Needle and Newt kind of chuckled as I stood and gestured for them to come outside. The cabin was too small for me to be showing these three guys the two step.

“Ok, Newt. Come here.” I said, standing in the dirt patch in front of the porch. He walked down the three steps to stand in front of me. “Alright, so I’m going to show you the moves first, ok?” I said, watching his face.

“Yes ma’am.” He said with a nod.

I smiled, coming around to his side. “Ok, so you need to watch your feet while you’re learning, but when we start dancing, if you watch your feet, you throw yourself off.” I said and he nodded.

“Ok. The first step you take is with your right leg, then you take two quick steps with your left.” I said, demonstrating the move. “Does that make sense?” I asked, watching his face.

He seemed mildly confused. “One step with the right, then two with the left.” He said, more to himself.

I showed him again and he looked less confused.

“Now you try.” I told him.

Three steps later, he turned to me. “Like that?” He said, looking wary.

I smiled. “That was perfect.” He smiled proudly as I told him to do it again and he did great. “Ok. Now normally the guy leads. Those three steps are to lead.” I said, coming around to face him. “So this hand goes here,” I said, moving his left hand to sit right above my hip. “And this hand holds mine.” I said, taking his right hand to hold mine. “Is that ok?” I asked, seeing as he looked uncomfortable.

“Yes ma’am.” Newt said, a hitch in his voice.

“When was the last time Newt was that close to a girl?” Jasper laughed, elbowing Needle, who shook his head.

“Jasper, she’s gonna box your ears and I’m gonna hold you for her.” Needle said.

Jasper’s eyes were downcast as he stopped talking.

I set my right hand on Newt’s shoulder. “So since you’re leading, it’s your job as a gentleman to make sure I don’t run into anything or trip on uneven ground.” I said with a little smile.

Newt nodded. Well, at least he’d catch me if I fell. That was always a good sign.

“Ok, so do you remember the steps?” I asked.

He nodded. “Right, left, left.” He said.

I smiled and gave a little nod. “On the count of three, alright?”

“What if I step on your toes?” He asked, looking down at his feet.

I moved my hand from his shoulder to under his chin to pull his gaze back to my eyes and gave him a little smile. “Don’t think about it. The more you think about it, the worse you’ll do. Concentrate on those three first steps, then don’t think about it.”

“But if I don’t think about it, how will I know I’m doing it right?” He asked, nervously.

I couldn’t help but smile at him. “Think about something else. The sunset, your horse, a happy time.” I told him.

He thought for a minute. “When I was little and Jake Spoon lived with us in Lonesome Dove, he used to take me into town and buy me hard candy.”

“See, that’s perfect. Think about that.” I said. “On three, ok?”

He nodded and took a breath.

“One, two, three.” I said slowly and his right foot moved forward, sending my left backwards. Then his left came forward expertly, moving my right backwards. Then he made me stumble when his right foot came back again.

“I’m so sorry, Miss McCrae.” He said.

I smiled at him. “Newt, don’t apologize. You did great for you first time. And call me Selene. Miss McCrae was my grandmother. Let’s try again, yeah?” I asked.

Reluctantly, he nodded and took my hand again.

“One, two, three.” I counted and he did the exact same thing. Right, left, right.

I could tell by the look on his face he was getting frustrated. “I ain’t cut for this dancin’ stuff.”

I shook my head. “Everyone’s made to dance. It’s just a little different for everybody. Were you thinking about Jake Spoon and the hard candy?”

He shook his head at me. “No ma’am.”

“Ok, well let’s try something else. Will you try one more time for me?” I asked, hoping to soothe his irritated nerves.

He nodded, looking sullen.

I started humming a few bars to a song that wouldn’t come out for nearly a hundred and thirty years. His eyes went a little blank as he listened to me hum. “Does that help?” I asked.

He looked up at me. “I think so.”

I smiled. “Ok, one more try. If it doesn’t work this time, you don’t have to do it anymore and at least I can say you tried.”

Newt nodded. “Yes ma’am.” He said, taking my hands.

“This time I’m just going to hum a song. You can start whenever you want to, alright?” I asked.

Jasper snorted from the porch and I let go of Newt’s hand to turn to the porch. The look of fear in Jasper’s eyes as he stumbled to stand up was real. But Newt grabbed my hand. “He ain’t worth it.” Newt said.

I glared at Jasper. “One more comment, Jasper. Say one more thing.” I told him.

Jasper nodded quickly as Needle tipped his hat to me.

Newt pulled me back to where we were standing in the dirt as the sun was starting to fade from the sky, casting a pretty red glow on everything.

I sighed, pretending to let go of the tension I could feel starting in my shoulders. “Whenever you want.” I said and thought for a minute what to hum for him.

Billy Currington’s ‘Let Me Down Easy’ was as good as anything, I figured. I started humming along with the words I heard in my head and watched as Newt’s eyes focused on something directly behind my left shoulder.

It took him a minute, but then his right leg moved forward and I moved my left. Then his left came forward and I tried my best to focus on the tune instead of where my feet were moving. Newt’s left leg slid forward again, making me take another step back with my right.

I kept with the tune of the song in my head and Newt went straight back to his right leg. We moved in a counter-clockwise circle twice before I stopped humming and beamed at him.

He looked at me, a little dazed. “What?” He asked.

“Newt! You just danced me in a circle!” I said excitedly.

“Twice.” Needle added with a smile, holding up two fingers to emphasize.

“Really?” Newt asked, looking very proud of himself.

“Really, really. You did great.” I said.

He just smiled at me, a little red creeping up his neck to his cheeks. He went to sit on the porch, ducking his head to probably try to hide the red.

“Ma’am, I think I’d like to try next, if that’s alright.” Needle said, before Jasper could open his mouth.

“Of course.” I said as he stood with a smile. “Do you understand it the way I explained it to Newt?”

“I think so, ma’am.” He said.

We practiced the right, left, left steps pretty quickly, then we got into position. “On the count of three, ok?” I asked and he nodded. “One, two, three.” I said, counting slowly.

He took off a little fast, not allowing me to move my foot and he ended up tripping me. I laughed two or three times before Needle and Newt picked me up off the ground.

“I am so sorry, Miss McCrae.” Needle said, looking almost pained.

I just smiled. “Oh, it’s not the first time I’ve landed in the dirt and certainly won’t be the last. And stop this Miss McCrae stuff. Please.”

“I really am sorry, ma’am.” He said.

“Needle. It’s ok. It was an accident.” I said, moving his hand to rest on my hip and taking his other hand in mine. “Let’s try again, just a touch slower. One, two, three.” I told him and he started much slower this time.

He had a difficult time moving fluidly. He’d take a step, then pause. And take a step, then pause. Which, of course, threw off my own timing.

Needle looked disappointed. I set my hand on his arm. “Hey, it’s ok. I have had much, much worse dance partners. You’re doing great. Just gotta smooth you out a bit.” I told him.

He nodded.

“How about dinner? I’m getting a bit hungry.” I said.

The boys followed me inside and Needle put the Dutch oven in the bed of coals to warm up.

“She don’t know how to make biscuits neither.” Jasper said, under his breath as he intently watched the wood grain.

“Then you make them, Jasper.” I told him.

“I’ll show ya how.” Newt said, putting two cups of beans in the pot to cook. He pulled out a bunch of ingredients from the little cabinet next to the wood range and set them on the table. He started with putting the dry ingredients in a bowl, then scraping up the bacon fat from that morning and working it through with his hands. Then he asked Jasper to go get some milk, to which he reluctantly agreed.

When Jasper came back with the milk, Newt added about a cup and worked it through with his hands. He then took a knife and cut the dough into squares and had Needle bring the Dutch oven over. With the Dutch oven on the table, Newt put the biscuits on the bottom of the pan and Needle replaced it in the fire place, putting a few coals on top of it with a shovel.

I watched the ham and beans as the boys excused themselves to the porch. I figured they’d be smoking and drinking, so I told them I’d call them when dinner was ready. I sat at the table, and for the first time in a day, thought about Gerry. Was time moving the same way there as it was here?

Was he worried about me? Was there any way I could get a message to him? I wondered if I went to the post office if they could deliver a letter in a hundred and thirty-six years. What would I tell him? I could just picture the letter I’d write.

“Gerry,” I said quietly to myself. “Wound up in 1877 on a cattle ranch in Montana. Two of the six guys here are decently attractive and I have no way to get home. Might want to refresh me on the returning home part, since we never actually went through all that. By the way, if you could talk me out of wearing my rocker t-shirt and my neon converse, that’d help me out incredibly. P.S., seriously need to tell me how the frick to get back.” I laughed at myself as I stood to check the biscuits.

Almost done, but still needed a few more minutes.

I tried to imagine Gerry’s reaction to my imaginary letter as I sat back down. He’d look over at me from the other side of the couch with this look of awe on his face. Then he’d beam so big, you’d think his teeth would break and he’d explain every single way you could get back if you’d successfully time traveled. I’d just look at him like he was crazy.

Because, time travel? Really? This was real life, not a science fiction book. But as I thought about it; my life had suddenly become a Western, instead of a sci-fi book. And who figured I’d end up in a Western of all things?

Sci-fi or fantasy. Hell, a hopeless romance book where the guy dies at the end was more realistic then me ending up in a Western.

I shook my head, wondering how I was going to explain this to Gerry if I got back. Sadness washed over me. If, if I got back.

But I was broke from my thoughts as something crashed outside. I rushed to the door, yanking it open, to see Newt and Jasper wrestling on the ground. Needle stood, leaning on the support beam. “What the hell are they doing?” I asked.

“Fightin’, I reckon.” He said.

“Why?” I asked, confused.

Needle shrugged, but I could tell that he knew. “Best just let them work it out.” He said as Jasper nailed Newt in the jaw.

My hands covered my mouth. “They’re just going to beat the living shit out of each other?” I asked.

Needle ducked his head. “It’s the only way they work things out, ma’am. Probably best if you go back in the cabin.”

But I couldn’t. It was like watching a car wreck. I couldn’t look away from them. Newt got on his feet and sucker punched Jasper, knocking him back over.

It took another five minutes before they finally stopped, both panting and struggling to stand.

I couldn’t stand back anymore. I rushed over to Newt and took his face in my hands. “Newt. What on earth are you doing fighting Jasper?” I asked, looking over the cuts and bruises beginning to form.

Newt winced as my hand touched his face. “He wasn’t being a gentleman.”

“So you punched him?” I asked, still confused.

“Jasper started it. Newt just finished it.” Needle said from the porch.

“He hit me first.” Jasper squeaked.

“He may have, but you started it.” Needle said and I saw the pointed look he gave Jasper.

Newt’s lip was cut, as was a section near his nose and he had a bruise starting on his cheek and around his eye. Jasper’s eye looked like it was starting to swell shut, and his lip was split in two places, along with a bruise on his cheek.

I shook my head. “I don’t think anything was worth getting beat up this bad.” I told Newt, not worrying too much about Jasper right now.

Newt stood a little straighter and looked me dead in the eye. “Yes, ma’am. It was worth every punch I threw.” He said, with dead conviction.

I swallowed, wondering now if I really wanted to know what it was about or not. “If you say so, Newt.” I told him quietly. “Come inside and we’ll clean those cuts.” I said, laying his arm across my shoulders. “Needle, will you bring in Jasper?” I asked.

He nodding, roughly dragging Jasper up the steps.


	3. The One about Fighting

I set Newt at the table, and before I forgot, I pulled the biscuits out of the coals. I took a glance at them and they were golden brown. I set them on top of the wood range and brought over the wash basin. I grabbed an extra piece of cloth and used it for a rag. I then had Newt turn his chair to face me and I began cleaning his cuts.

“Why are earth would you hit Jasper?” I asked him quietly. He just looked away from me. “It can’t be bad enough you can’t tell me.” I said softly, gently dabbing at his lip.

“Ain’t right for me to say.” Newt said.

I frowned at him. “Why’s that?”

“It ain’t right to have been said in the first place, so it ain’t right to be repeated.” He told me, still not looking at me.

“Was it about me?” I asked quietly.

Newt said nothing and if it was even possible, he stared harder at the floor.

I gave a little laugh, making the boys look at me. I smiled at Newt. “I’ve been called much worse than whatever Jasper said about me.”

Newt shook his head. “No ma’am. It was bad.”

I smiled at him, resting my hand under his chin. “I swear to you, it’s nothing I haven’t heard before.” I said as I stood up to move around the table and sit in front of Jasper. I wrung out the rag, gently touching it to Jasper’s cuts.

“See, I told ya she was a whore.” Jasper said in normal tones.

I’ve never seen a man move as fast as Newt did to stand up. Needle rushed forward and I stood up, turning to him. I could almost see the red in Newt’s eyes. I set my hands on his chest as he tried to move around me.

I started humming Let Me Down Easy again and it took a moment, but Newt calmed himself. He wouldn’t look away from Jasper though.

“Apologize to the lady.” Newt said, but Jasper just sat there. “Apologize this minute.” Newt said louder.

“Sorry, ma’am.” Jasper said.

“Newt, why don’t you dish up yours and Needle’s food and start eating? I’ll get my food as soon as I finish cleaning up Jasper.” I told him.

He was about to protest when Needle pulled him over to the range to dish the beans and biscuits.

I sat back down and started cleaning Jasper’s face with the rag I re-wetted.

“Why ya cleaning my face?” Jasper asked quietly.

“Because if I don’t, it’ll get infected.” I told him.

“Why ya cleaning it at all?” He asked, eyes slightly downcast.

“I might be harsh and somewhat rude, but I’m not cruel.” I told him, giving him a look.

His head dipped a little bit more. “I’m sorry, ma’am.” He said, almost too quiet for me to hear.

“I’ve been called worse Mr. Fant, and I’m sure I’ll be called worse again at some point in my life. But Newt seems to want to stand up for my honor, which I commend him for. Not many men do that anymore where I’m from. So unless you want more cuts and bruises or possibly worse, I’d learn to keep a hold of that tongue of yours for your sake, not mine.” I told him, standing up and putting the wash basin off to the side.

I then dished mine and Jasper’s plates, setting his in front of him on the table. We ate in silence for the rest of the meal. When the boys were done, Jasper and Needle dismissed themselves, Newt helping me pick up plates.

“Would you like help, Miss McCrae?” Newt asked and I looked at him over my shoulder. “Miss Selene.” He corrected himself.

I smiled. “Would you carry this for me?” I asked, handing him the tub of dishes.

“Yes ma’am.” He said, taking the tub from me.

I grabbed the pitcher for the wash basin and opened the door for Newt. When we stepped onto the porch, I saw Needle and Jasper smoking something out of pipe. I nodded to Needle as I closed the door and Newt followed me down to the lake.

I filled up the pitcher and set it off to the side before starting on the dishes. I was almost done with rinsing the dishes when Newt spoke up.

“What’s worse than being called a whore, ma’am?” He asked, looking like he didn’t know if he should ask or not.

I shrugged. “People are more creative with their insults where I come from. I’ve heard a lot of different ones.”

“Like what, ma’am? If that’s ok.” Newt asked.

I smiled at him. “I was once… courting a man,” I said, having to think about the right word. Dating wasn’t exactly an acceptable term yet. “And we were pretty happy for a while. But then he started ignoring me and it upset me, so I told him we couldn’t see each other anymore if he was going to continue to ignore me. He told his whole family that I was seeing several other men behind his back. I guess calling me a whore, but it hurt worse when he said it.” I said, looking over at Newt. “Does that make sense?”

He nodded. “Yes ma’am.” He said, staying quiet while I finished the rest of the dishes. “I don’t know what came over me, ma’am.”

I looked over at him as I stacked the clean dishes in the tub. “What do you mean?”

He took a minute to think it through before he stood up and grabbed the tub. “We was just talking and he asked me what kind of woman couldn’t make biscuits. He said a woman who couldn’t make biscuits was probably a whore.”

I stood up with him, picking up the pitcher.

“That wasn’t right of him saying that. So I just hit him.” Newt said, sounding sorry about it.

I carried the pitcher with my left hand, putting my right arm around his elbow as we walked back up the little hill. “I know of two men who would be willing to stand up for me like that. And one of them has a bunch of cuts on his face.” I told him, leaning towards him slightly.

“Who’s the other, ma’am?” He asked.

“My friend, Gerry. He’s very much like you. He gets pushed around sometimes, but if someone pushes me around, he’ll fight you hard.” I said with a smile.

“I’d like to meet him, ma’am, if I could.” Newt said.

I looked over at him. “Well, we’ll have to see. He lives a long ways away, but I’d like you to meet him if it was possible.” I told him as we came around the corner of the house.

Needle took a sip out of a bottle with amber colored liquid in it and handed it to Jasper, who in turn, handed it to Newt when he was close enough. Newt set the tub down and took a swig before handing it back.

I really wanted a swig, but I wasn’t going to ask for it unless offered.

“Ma’am, we don’t usually offer liquor to women, but if you’d like to have some, you feel free.” Needle said and I could tell the whiskey was making him relax.

Jasper held the bottle in my direction and I took it from him, taking a swig. I swallowed and made a little bit of a face before handing it back. I coughed once. “God, that’s strong stuff.” I said, rubbing my collar bone like it would help.

Newt and Needle smiled. “Yes ma’am.” Newt said, picking up the tub and taking it inside.

I followed him inside, trying to breathe again. “I’ve never been a baby when it came to liquor, but that’s like gasoline.” I said, then paused.

Newt turned and gave me a funny look. “Gasoline?” He asked.

Shit. Shit. Think. Fast. Like, right now. “Uh, it’s stuff we use to make fires in Colorado.”

He just looked at me funny. “I never heard of it, ma’am.” He said.

I shrugged, trying to play it off. “It’s alright.” I said, stacking the dishes up on the shelf above the wood range. Hopefully he wouldn’t ask about it anymore. I went to the fire and added another log, momentarily forgetting that Newt was just standing there.

The fire was a bed of coals from the Dutch oven, so I had to blow on it a bit to get it to catch the wood.

“You’re good with fire, ma’am.” Newt said.

I smiled into the blaze. “My dad sold fire places when I was younger.” I said, looking back at him. “Ya know the ones they put in fancy houses with the grates and everything.”

Newt nodded. “Miss Allan had one of those in her house.”

I nodded back.

Newt and I were quiet for a moment, enjoying the silence of the other. I didn’t feel like it was awkward; like we had to talk to fill the space.

“Why don’t many men stand up for you?” Newt asked and I turned to him.

“What do you mean, Newt?” I asked.

“When you were talkin’ to Jasper. You said not many men where you come from stand up for you like I did.” He said, leaning against the table.

I nodded. “They’re not as polite. And it’s not that all of them are rude, but they aren’t polite. They’re harsh when they talk to you. They don’t ‘yes ma’am’ like you do.” I told him. “I was once with a man that hit me when he got mad. I’d say something and his temper would flare, so he’d hit me.”

Newt looked angry as I told him this.

I shrugged. “It’s in the past and I can’t do anything to change it. But now I know for the future.”

“I ain’t never hit a woman. Captain Call doesn’t like women around much, but he hates rude behavior. Says he won’t tolerate it.” Newt told me.

I nodded. “I imagine that to be true in both parts.”

“Ma’am,” Newt started, still leaning against the table. “You suppose I could get another lesson?”

I smiled. “Newt Dobbs, you can have as many lessons as you’d like.”

He smiled back, blushing just a touch as he went to the door and opened it for me. I stepped through and Needle and Jasper halted their conversation.

“Don’t mind us. Newt just wanted another dancing lesson. The cabin’s a bit small.” I told them and Needle tipped his hat.

I led Newt to the dirt patch in front of the porch; the lanterns casting an eerie glow for fifteen feet or so. “Do you remember the steps?” I asked him as Needle and Jasper continued their conversation in hushed tones.

“I believe so, ma’am.” He said, taking my left hand with his right and putting his left hand on my hip.

I set my right hand on his shoulder with a smile. “Would you like me to count or would you like me to hum?”

“I believe it best if you hum ma’am.” He told me.

I nodded. “Then I’ll hum.” I told him. I took a second, then started humming to him.

This time, he seemed to be looking at my shoulder, instead of behind it. I had been humming for almost ten seconds when he took his first step, leading me. I tried to pay attention to the melody in my head, but it seemed the more I hummed, the harder it was. There was just something about Newt, in this light that made me want to just look at him.

He did amazingly well for his second real time dancing.

“How’m I doin’?” He asked warily, still leading me in a circle.

“Marvelous. You’re doing perfect.” I said with a grin.

“Am I really?” He asked as we continued to dance.

“Really, really.” I said, giving him a soft smile as he looked at me for the first time.

“It ain’t so hard.” He told me.

“Not at all.” I told him.

We danced for a few more minutes before he asked for a break. I said yes, of course. We all sat on the porch for a long while, listening to the sounds of the cattle and the coyotes off in the distance. I hadn’t even realized how tired I was until I yawned two or three times.

“It’s getting’ late, miss. Maybe you should get to bed.” Needle said.

I nodded and stood up. “Goodnight.” I told them.

“Goodnight ma’am.” Needle said, slipping his hat off his face.

“ ’Night ma’am. Sleep well.” Newt said, a bit too eagerly.

I smiled back at him. “You too, Newt.” I said, before closing the door to the cabin. I put another couple logs on the fire place and looked over at my clothes that still sat in the corner. One gray hoodie, one rocker tee, and one pair of dark blue jeans.

I shook my head, not sure how I had gotten into this whole mess. And it was such a mess. How was I supposed to get home? I knew there was supposed to be another storm, at some point. And Gerry said I had twelve days to get back through. Ok, eleven now. But what happened if a storm didn’t come back through?

Or what if it did? What if I got attached to these men and then had to leave? How would I feel about that? I didn’t have answers to any of my questions and as best as I could figure, I had no one to ask that wouldn’t commit me to the crazy house.

I sighed, wishing the tension in my shoulders would go away and I pulled my hoodie over to use as a pillow, pulling the blanket around me. I still didn’t enjoy sleeping on the hard floor, but it could have been worse. I could have ended up wandering the forest for a day or two. I fixed my eyes on the fire, wondering if I could get to sleep.


	4. The One about Horses

It had been probably close to an hour later when I heard a squeak from the porch. The boys had gone to bed in the barn, because I’d heard them talk as they left the porch. The squeak of the wood now on the porch was as if someone was sneaking around.

Honestly, I hadn’t even checked to see if the door was locked. But I figured it was one of the guys, wanting a biscuit for a midnight snack so I stayed still on the floor. The fire flickered and I heard the latch lift on the door. Part of me was worried about bandits or robbers and part of me was saying I was being stupid.

No spurs clinked as the person walked across the floor, but their cowboy boots clicked on the wood floor. The latch closed again and I tried not to shiver from the draft they let in. The boots clicked a couple more steps forward, but I couldn’t place where exactly they were in the cabin.

Suddenly, my arm was being yanked on, rolling me onto my back roughly. I gasped as Jasper straddled me, roughly kissing my neck as he held my hands down. “Get off! Jasper, get off me!” I screamed, thrashing to get out of his grip.

“Only a whore doesn’t know how to make biscuits. So I want my poke.” He said, pulling open the buttons at the top of my dress.

“Newt! Needle! Help!” I screamed, thrashing still against him.

He just smiled. “They’re out cold. Ain’t gonna hear ya.” He said, holding both my hands with his one as he started to undo his pants.

He leaned over just enough while trying to unbutton his pants that I leaned up and bit him on the cheek. “Ouch!” He screeched and I scrambled away from him, trying to stand to run to the door.

I flung open the door and ran into Newt’s arms. “What-“ He started, but stopped, seeing Jasper kneeling on the floor with his pants undone, holding his cheek.

“Jasper.” He said in a deadly calm voice. Newt started forward, but I knew if Newt got out of my hands, he’d kill Jasper.

“Take Newt.” Needle said, stepping past me.

I took Newt’s arms and turned him around. I pulled him with me, up the hill a little bit, still in sight of the house. I didn’t realize until Newt pulled me to a stop that I was crying. I turned to him and his features were softer, more concerned.

“Did he… did he…” He started, stammering out the words.

I shook my head. “No, no. Just tried. That’s all.” I said, standing there feeling useless.

Newt took a step towards me and wiped my tears away with his thumbs. “Ain’t right. Ain’t right at all.” He said simply.

I shook my head, trying to hold back my tears. “No, it ain’t.” I said, turning away from him to wipe my face. I was stronger than this damn it. I shouldn’t be crying in front of a guy I’ve known for a day.

“Needle took Jasper to the barn.” Newt said quietly.

I nodded. “He won’t hurt him, will he?”

“I ‘spect not. Probably give him a lick with the horse whip.” Newt said, his eyes trained on the barn.

“Thank you.” I mumbled. “For saving me.”

I could see Newt shift out of the corner of my vision. “I shouldn’t have left you in the cabin on your own. I shoulda slept on the porch.” He said.

I turned around, still wiping off my face. “It’s not your fault.” I said, sitting on the ground before my knees gave out. I was shaking so badly that when I sat down, my knees knocked together.

Newt sat next to me. “I can go get ya a blanket.” He said.

I shook my head, leaning it on his shoulder. “Please don’t.” I said.

After a moment he nodded and put his arm around my shoulders. “This ok?”

I nodded on his shoulder. “It’s just fine, Newt.”

A few minutes later, Needle started up the hill towards us and I picked my head up off Newt’s shoulder. Needle dipped his head a little before kneeling in front of us. “He said he didn’t do nuthin’, but I never trust a man with his pants around his ankles.” Needle said.

“No, he didn’t. Sure as hell tried, but he didn’t.” I told him. “Did you whip him?” I asked, quietly.

Needle dipped his head, obviously not sure what his answer should be. “I tied him to the hitching post in the barn. I did give him a lick with the horse whip, but it ain’t nothin’ he ain’t got before.”

I nodded, leaning back on Newt’s shoulder. I could feel my tears well up, but I refused to let them fall. I didn’t want to be weak. I blinked, looking straight up at the moon.

“You alright, miss?” Needle asked, quietly.

I nodded. “Nothin’ I ain’t gone through before.” I said with a smile. He ducked his head and I felt silly for saying it. “I would appreciate it if someone could sleep on the porch for me though.” I said, looking back down at the ground.

“I’ll do it.” Newt volunteered.

Needle nodded. “I’ll move your bed things.” He said, standing up and walking back down the hill.

I sighed. “I think it’ll do us all some good to forget this ever happened.” I said with a nod to myself.

Newt shook his head and stood up. Then he held out his hand to help me up. I took his hand and we walked down the hill side by side. Needle waited by the porch. “I’ll make sure Jasper doesn’t leave the barn if I gotta tie him up.” Needle said with a nod to each of us.

I smiled thank you, then said a quiet goodnight to Newt as I climbed the stairs and went inside. I looked for a lock and found a bolt that slid into the wall from the door.

I had a rough time sleeping the rest of the night. I dozed in and out of consciousness. Once, I woke to see a shadow figure, but it was a shadow cast by the weak firelight. I felt unsafe in the cabin now. I rolled from side to side in front of the fire place with no luck.

By the time there was a little bit of pink above the mountains, I had given up the thought of sleep and decided the fire was much more an interesting sight. I sat like this until the sun was within a half hour of rising. I stood and picked up the Dutch oven, setting it on the bed of coals and scooping some on top of the lid with the shovel. I filled the coffee pot with water and got it going on the wood range. Then I went to the cupboard that held the supplies for making biscuits and got to work. I mixed and measured as best as I could.

Then I cut them up and brought the Dutch oven over to set the biscuits in before I returned them to the bed of coals. I put the lid back on and returned to the wood range to start frying the bacon. By the time the bacon was done and I was about the start eggs, there was a knock on the door.

“Ma’am.” Needle and Newt said with a nod.

“Where’s Jasper?” I asked.

“Still tied to the hitching post, ma’am.” Needle said.

“You can bring him in for breakfast.” I said.

“With all due respect ma’am, I don’t trust him none to be around you. I think it best if I just take him breakfast and we start on the morning chores.” Needle told me.

I nodded, turning to check the bacon. I pulled it off the burner and put it on another plate. Then I cracked three eggs and started frying them. The guys sat in silence until I heard one of them cough.

I pulled the eggs off the burner, putting one on each of their plates. I set Needle and Newt’s plates in front of them, then set down the biscuits and the bacon. I sat down across from Needle as they started getting their food. We ate in silence until the boys excused themselves.

“You need anything ma’am, just gotta holler.” Newt said and Needle dipped his head.

“Thanks boys.” I said, turning back to the dishes.

I stacked them all in the tub and headed down to the lake. After I finished, I stacked them all up and started up the hill to the house. I looked up the hill and saw three men on horseback cresting the hill. Call and his men were back. Yippee.

Less than five minutes later, you could hear the horses in the courtyard from inside the cabin. I wiped my hands on the dress and pulled open the door. I could see Call briefly talk at the guys, then head towards me.

“Morning, Captain.” I called.

“Morning ma’am.” He said, pulling his hat from his head. “I regret to report we’ve not found your traveling companion.”

I nodded and pretended to be remorseful. “It’s fine. Thank you for looking, Captain.”

He nodded. “How’s it gone?”

“Been fine. Jasper’s been a bit difficult to deal with, but we took care of it. Have you had breakfast, Captain?” I asked.

His face was curious when I brought up Jasper, but he shook his head no. “We’ve not, ma’am.”

“Well we’ve got plenty of bacon left. I’ll put on some eggs.” I smiled, hoping against hope that my being cheery wasn’t telling him how nervous I was.

He nodded. “I’ll tell the boys to wash up.” He said and I smiled, feeling like that was something a husband would say to his wife.

I nodded to him and returned to the wood range to cook three more eggs. I set the biscuits back in the fire to warm up a little. When the eggs were cooked, I pulled the biscuits out. I stepped to the door to call Woodrow and his men when I saw them start towards the house.

I dished up their plates as they came through the door and handed one to each, who thanked me.

“Newt mentioned an incident with Jasper.” The Captain said, around bites of egg and bacon. “That he attacked you.”

Pea Eye and Dish stopped eating and looked between me and Captain Call.

I shook my head as I went to the fire to add another log. “Not sure what you’re talking about, Captain.”

“Never known Newt to lie to me ma’am.” Captain Call said.

“He’s not lying. It wasn’t… it’s not…” I said, stumbling over my words. I sighed and ran my fingers through my hair. “It was taken care of.”

“I hate rude behavior in a man. Won’t tolerate it.” The Captain said as he stood from the table.

I rushed forward, taking a hold of his arm. “Captain, you had a long couple days and this ordeal would be best forgotten about by me. Jasper already got a lash with the horse whip. There’s no reason for action unless he does it again and I doubt it’ll happen again.”

“Why’s that, ma’am?” He asked me, staring me in the eye.

“Because, as far as I can tell, Newt seems protective of me for some reason. He wanted to kill Jasper last night. He about beat him to death earlier that same day. That’s why they both have cuts on their faces.” I told him.

Captain Call gave a short nod then went back to the table. “Newt said he’d like to take you into town with him.”

“I can’t ride a horse.” I said, glancing out the front window.

“Newt and Dish’ll teach ya.” The Captain said and Dish gave a short nod.

After breakfast, Captain Call told me to forget the dishes and to follow Dish out to the barn. Only one horse was saddled; a brown horse with a star on his head.

“This here’s Little Dipper.” Newt told me, finishing up adjusting the saddle.

“Why Little Dipper?” I asked.

“The star on his forehead.” Newt told me.

I smiled and shook my head. I’m sure Newt couldn’t know that Ursa Minor was the little bear; not horse, so I just shook my head. Just looking at the horse made me nervous.

“It’s easy. Me and Dish’ll be right here.” Newt said and Dish nodded.

“This seems like such a bad idea.” I said quietly, watching Little Dipper.

“C’mon now.” Newt said, leaning over a bit and weaving his hands together, like a step.

I took a deep breath and blew it out. I put my left food on his hand, so I could swing my right foot over the saddle. Even sitting on the leather gave me an uneasy stomach.

“How’s that?” Dish asked.

“A lot worse.” I said, making him chuckle. Newt took the reins of Little Dipper and started walking me out of the barn. “This is such a bad idea.” I said, trying to calm down.

“Ya need to relax. The horse can tell when you’re nervous.” Dish told me, walking on my right side.

“Horses and I don’t get along.” I told him.

“Ain’t never met nobody Little Dipper didn’t like.” Newt said as we walked down to the lake.

“Where are we going?” I asked, looking out across the lake. A buzzard flew overhead. On the other side of the lake, a coyote dashed back into the forest.

“Right here.” Newt said, coming to stand in front of the horse and me. “These reins control which way the horse goes. They know by the feel which way to go. Pull it right, they go right.” He said, turning the reins and walking with the horse in a circle. “Same happens the other way.” He said, pulling the other direction and walking us in a circle.

“Now I just feel silly.” I told him.

He smiled. “To slow him down, just pull back on the reins. Don’t jerk none or else you’ll hurt him.” He said, handing me the reins.

“What am I supposed to do with these?” I asked, taking the leather cord from him.

“Give him a gentle kick in the ribs and he’ll start walking. Pull on the reins to make him stop.” Dish said.

“What happens if he starts running?” I asked, looking at both of them.

Newt shook his head. “He ain’t gonna start running. That’s why you’re on him instead of Hell Bitch.”

I blinked a few times. “You named your horse Hell Bitch?”

Dish chuckled, ducking his head and trying to hide his smirk.

Newt looked a bit put out. “Well, no I didn’t. Captain Call did and gave her to me when I was range boss.” I nodded, thankful to get the conversation away from my own horse. “Give him a little kick.” Newt told me.

I sighed and gave Little Dipper the softest kick with my heels I could manage. He took four or five steps before I gently pulled on the reins and he stopped, looking around like he was bored.

Newt smiled. “You’re natural.” He told me.

I shook my head. “Now what?”

“You sit here and Dish and me’ll get our horses. Then we’ll come back out and take a ride.” Newt said.

I raised my eyebrows. “Wait. You’re going to leave me on your horse?” I asked him.

“You can start walking him around the lake if you’d like.” Dish told me.

I shook my head. “Yeah, I’d rather do that with someone who has a gun.” I said, remembering the coyote run back into the trees.

Dish tipped his hat and started up the hill.

“You’ll do fine here. Let out the reins a bit and Little Dipper’ll start eating the grass. We’ll be right back.” He said, starting up the hill.


	5. The one about Talking Outloud

The barn really wasn’t that far away. It just seemed like it took forever. I slowly started to feel more comfortable on the leather saddle. Little Dipper ate some grass and I just watched the lake.

By the time the guys came back with their horses, I was really just ready to do something.

“Ready for that ride?” Newt asked.

“Yes sir.” I said and he blushed a bit, leading the way. I gave Little Dipper a soft kick and he started following Newt’s horse.  “So how long have you been riding horses, Dish?” I called behind me, turning slightly.

“Since as far back as I can recall, ma’am.” Dish said.

I nodded. “And you, Newt?” I asked.

“Jake Spoon gave me my first horse ride when I was five ma’am.” Newt said.

“When did you first ride a horse?” Dish called to me.

I had to think about it for a minute. “I was probably ten or eleven.”

Silence came for a while and I just tried to pay attention to where we were going. We’d been riding for what felt like a half an hour and we were well out of range of the cabin, but still in the valley. Newt held up his hands and we stopped riding.

At first I couldn’t hear it, but after a minute, I could hear voices. Someone was talking. A minute later, they came around the closest bend, about fifty yards away. Two white men, a Mexican and one of them looked Indian. A very diverse group for a time when people still owned slaves.

“Well, lookie here. What we got? Two cowboys and a whore?” One of the four men asked.

Little Dipper shifted his weight and I could feel he liked this as much as I did.

“She’s a lady. Have some respect.” Newt said, fire in the veins.

The bandits then mocked me by tipping their hats.

“Well, what’chu doin’ out ‘ere, boy?” One of the white men asked.

“We’re just tryin’ to scare up some dinner. Expect you boys to have run off most of our game, since we heard you comin’ up about two minutes ago.” Newt bluffed, but that was ok. They didn’t know that.

Their eyes kept flickering to me and I felt incredibly uncomfortable. Dish ribbed his horse a bit to stand next to Newt and in front of me; blocking most of their view of me.

 _Thank god for cowboys_ , I thought.

“You boys best move along, now. I might be inclined to shoot you for trespassing.” Dish said, keeping his hand at his side near his pistol.

“You ain’t heard us that far back.” The Mexican laughed, ignoring Dish.

“And ‘sides, we ain’t saw no sign sayin’ we was on private property.” One of the white men said.

“Best if you’re on your way. I need to collect us some supper.” Newt said, appearing at ease with the situation.

The band of men laughed and yelled a few snide comments in my direction as they passed on by us.

When they were out of sight, Newt turned around on his saddle. “You alright?”

I nodded. “Yep. So we’re hunting, eh?” I asked.

Dish shook his head. “Leave it to a woman.” He said with a smile.

I shrugged.

“Yeah, we were trying. They were sorta loud.” Newt said, sending a disapproving glance to where they disappeared into the trees.

We continued on in quiet for another few minutes until, in what seemed to be one quick motion; Newt pulled his rifle out of the holster, aimed, and shot. And to my immense surprise, a mule deer fell over.

I just kind of sat there in awe.

“You alright, ma’am?  Dish asked, coming to sit beside me as Newt went to check on the deer.

“That was insane.” I said, my eyes never moving from where Newt dismounted and inspected the deer.

“Don’t reckon I know what that means, ma’am.” He said, ducking his head a little.

“Oh.” I said, remembering where I was. “I don’t think I’ve ever seen anyone shoot a deer that quickly.”

Dish nodded and trotted off to help Newt gut the thing. I ribbed Little Dipper a bit to get closer, but I stood well out of the way of the innards. When they were done, they slung the deer over the back of Dish’s horse and they mounted their horses.

“You ready, ma’am?” Newt asked.

I nodded and Newt lead the way. It took me a few minutes to realize why the deer had been put on Dish’s horse instead of Newt’s. They didn’t want me staring at the deer the whole way back to the cabin.

When we walked the horses to the mouth of the stable, Pea Eye and Needle took care of the horses while Newt and Dish went to work cutting up the deer. They all seemed to do this swiftly; so swiftly that I was left wondering what to do.

“Ma’am, would you like help down?” Needle asked, coming to the left side of Little Dipper.

“Um, I suppose to help avoid injuries, that’d probably be best.” I said, picking my right foot out of the stirrup. About the time my foot got over the horses but, Needle grabbed my waist and guided me down. I stumbled a bit when I made contact with the dirt.

“I’ll take your horse.” He said, taking the reins.

“Needle?” I asked, making him stop and turn to me. “Would you mind showing me how to put him up?”

He smiled. “Not at all.” He said.

It took me a little while, as I wasn’t used to working with the horses the way the boys were.  When I was done, I noticed that the boys were still taking apart the animal with the help of Captain Call. When he saw I was done in the barn, he waved me over.

“Hope ya ain’t squeamish.” He said to me as I came over to see them slicing off cuts of meat and putting them in a pan.

“Not enough to puke.” I told him and he looked at me funny. It took a moment to realize it was my choice of words. “Not enough to lose my breakfast.” I reaffirmed.

He nodded, giving me a bit of a funny look again. “You know how to cook deer?”

I shrugged. “Same way you cook cow or elk.”

Call gave a little nod. “We’ll be having venison for dinner. The boys will ride you into town tomorrow.”

I tried to ignore his choice of words and focus on the task at hand. “Biscuits and beans for lunch?”

“Yes, ma’am. If you would.” Call said.

Woodrow was an odd character to me when I thought about it. He didn’t much like me, or women in general, but here he was, helping me out more than a lot of other people had before. He was letting me trade chores for room and board. He wasn’t kicking me out or telling me I had to leave. He didn’t smile or seem cheery at all, but he was an incredibly nice person.

I nodded, realizing I hadn’t answered him. “I assume Jasper will be allowed to join us for lunch?” I asked.

Call didn’t answer for a moment and I almost thought he was going to ignore me. I started to turn away when he spoke. “I suppose. Don’t be talkin’ to him none if you can help it though.” He said sternly.

I nodded. “Yes, sir.” I picked up the hem of my dress to it wouldn’t catch on the tall grass along the side of the cabin. Inside, I started the beans cooking and started a new batch of biscuits to put in the Dutch oven when the beans got closer.

I thought over the letter I’d write to Gerry, if I could. “Gerry,” I thought out loud to the quiet cabin. “So far, the ranch I ended up on isn’t bad. The range boss is pretty nice. There’s a boy here named Newt and he’s such a sweet heart. One of the other guys called me a few names and Newt all but tried to kill him. It was kind of sweet, I thought. You know there isn’t a guy alive that would be like you in that sense.

“Well, I guess, him and you aren’t alive at the same time, so that makes sense.” I said, feeling a little better when I talked to myself. I felt no need to include the incident with Jasper, even if I was just thinking out loud. “I got a lesson in horseback riding today. You know I don’t do well with horses. Do you remember that time we went up to your Aunt’s house in the mountains and she tried to teach us to ride her horses. You completely fell off yours and mine keep snorting and kicking the ground.”

I smiled at the memory. “But Newt, he’s a doll. You’d love him. I’d have to beat you off him with a stick. And there’s these other two guys, Dish and Needle. Yeah, his name is really Needle. They’re really nice. They’re like older brothers I never had. And this landscape,” I said with a sigh as I stirred the beans.

“Gerry, this landscape would take your breath away. I’ve never been to Montana before this, but it’s gorgeous Gerry. I’d send a picture if I could, but I think they’re a few years behind on picture mail.” I said with a smile.

“You talk to yourself an awful lot.” A voice said from behind me, making me spin so fast, I almost fell over.

“Dish… What… how long have you been standing there?” I said, mortified her heard me talking.

“Since right before you said my name.” He said, crossing his arms against his chest as he leaned against the wall and looked down.

I wanted to explain what I had been doing but that sounded no more crazy then just talking to myself. “I’m not crazy.” I said, lacking the luster of my words.

Dish looked up at me. “Came to see if you needed help.” He told me.

“I, uh. I almost got the beans done and then I’ll put the biscuits on.” I told him, scared to look at him. I didn’t know what he’d do if he thought I was completely off my rocker.

“You really think of me as a big brother?” He asked after a moment of silence.

I took a knife off the shelf and started cutting up the biscuits. “I suppose so, yeah.” I said, still avoiding eye contact.

“Why won’t ya look at me?” He asked, moving to stand in front of me on the other side of the table.

“I’m not crazy. It just calms my nerves to talk to myself.” I told him, still working on the biscuits and avoiding his gaze.

“Last I checked, your name wasn’t Gerry.” He told me, not moving from the spot on the other side of the table. I sighed, looking up at him. “How did you end up in Montana?” He asked.

I opened and closed my mouth. “Same way you did.” I told him.

He shook his head. “I don’t think you drove cattle 5,000 miles.”

I turned to put the Dutch oven in the bed of coals in the fireplace. “I don’t know what you want me to tell you, Dish.”

“Tell me the same thing you told the Captain. You must’ve told him something, because you wouldn’t be here if you hadn’t.” He said.

I turned to look at him, not sure that was the best idea. I didn’t want all the men knowing how I’d come to be here. “I honestly couldn’t tell you if I wanted to. When I fell, I hit my head and my memory is a little fuzzy. I lived in Denver.” I told him, which wasn’t really a lie. It just wasn’t a full truth.

He nodded, not entirely believing me. “You really like Newt.” He said.

“Was that a question or a statement, Mr. Boggett?” I asked.

Dish smiled. “A bit of both, I reckon.”

I nodded. “Then yes.” I said, stirring the beans as they cooked on the range.

Dish looked like he was pretending to kick an invisible rock with the tip of his boot. “He likes you an awful lot.”

“Oh?” I asked. I was under that impression, but you know what they say about assuming.

He nodded. “Yes, ma’am.” He said, looking over at the pan of beans. “He’s not very good with women.”

I smiled. “I’m not exactly good with men either, but he stills seems to have taken a shine to me.”

Dish nodded. “Newt told me you taught him to dance.”

I nodded. “I taught him and Needle. I was going to teach Jasper, but…” I trailed off, not meaning to bring up the subject. It hurt me a little to even mention Jasper, but I didn’t want Dish to see that. “But Jasper can be a bit difficult.”

Dish nodded. “I was wondering, ma’am, after the chores are done, if maybe you wouldn’t mind teaching me.”

I smiled. “I’d be glad to, after the chores are done of course.” I said.

He smiled a little bit. “I’ll tell the boys that lunch is ready then.” He said, sliding his hat back onto his head as he left the cabin.


	6. The One with Manners

A few minutes later, the men trooped into the cabin and hung their hats on the rack on the wall. I threw a towel to Dish, catching him a bit off guard which made me smile, and asked him to pull the biscuits off the fire.

He did, bringing the Dutch oven to the table as I brought over the pan of beans. We ate in silence mostly, although Pea Eye and Needle tossed comments back and forth.

The rest of the day seemed to pass slowly and when it came close to dinner time, I fried up the venison. A knock on the door about scared the crap out of me. “Yes?” I called.

Newt poked his head inside the cabin. “I didn’t mean to scare you, ma’am.”

“Oh, no. Just startled me.” I said, turning back to the frying meat. “Everything alright?”

“Yes, ma’am. Captain sent me to see if you needed any help.” He said.

“If you don’t mind, you could grab us some fire wood.” I said, glancing at the corner where the supply was depleted.

“Yes ma’am.” He nodded, turning to leave the cabin. He brought in four full arm-fulls and stacked them in the corner that was designated for the wood pile. “Anything else ma’am?”

I thought about it for a moment. “I suppose not. Are you done for the day then?” I asked, looking over at him.

“I believe so, ma’am.” He said.

I smiled. I had no idea why he felt the need to call me ma’am. “Well, if you’d like, you could sit and keep me company.” I told him. “This cabin gets a bit lonely after a while.”

He nodded and pulled out a chair. “Don’t you sing to yourself?” He asked.

I nodded a bit. “Sometimes, yeah. Sometimes, I can’t think of a song to save my life.” I told him.

“Well, sing me the one you hum so much.” He told me.

I smiled at him. “You wanna hear me sing?”

Newt smiled. “Oh yes ma’am. I’d love to.”

I smiled a bit bashfully and looked at the frying meat. “There’s a little moonlight, dancin’ on the sand. There’s a warm breeze blowin’ by the ocean as you’re takin’ my hand. You nee dto know where I’m standin’ now. That I’m right on the edge of givin’ in to ya. Baby it’s a long way down.” I sang to him, trying to pay attention to the meat at the same time.

“If I fall, can ya let me down easy? If I leave my heart with you tonight, will ya promise me that you’re gonna treat it right? I’m barely hangin’ on. If I fall, can ya let me down easy? The scent of your perfume, floatin' in the air. Lookin' like an angel, lyin' on a blanket with a halo of hair.

“And those lips, look to good to be true. Once I taste that kiss, I know what'll happen; I'll be at the mercy of you.” I finished as I successfully mixed the batch of biscuits and began cutting them up. I glanced at Newt and he had the biggest smile on his face. “What?” I asked, worried he was going to laugh at me.

“That was beautiful.” He said, looking very relaxed.

I shook my head. “If you say so.” I said, pulling the Dutch oven out of the coals.

He stood up suddenly, coming around to help me with the cast iron pot.  “I might as well be of some use.” He said, answering my questioning look.

I smiled and shook my head, placing the biscuits in the pan. Newt returned the pan to the coals and I finished frying the venison. “So you don’t listen to much music?” I asked him.

Newt just shook his head. “Miss Allan liked to play music for her husband before he passed. She said it helped him remember who he was.” He told me.

I nodded. “My mom used to call me a juke box. I was always singing this song or that, usually annoying her.” I said, taking the pan off the heat.

“At least you have your ma.” Newt said, a little saddened.

It suddenly struck me that I had no idea how Newt had ended up on a cattle ranch in Montana when he wasn’t related to anyone here. “What happened to her?” I asked, sitting down across from him.

“She died when I was little. Captain Call and Gus raised me up. They always told me they were good friends with my ma.” He told me, looking a little distant.

“Newt.” I said and he looked at me. “How on earth did you end up in Montana? I assume you’re from Texas, like Captain Call and Dish.”

He nodded. “Lonesome Dove. It’s so close to Mexico you could walk there. But Gus and Captain Call and Jake Spoon said Montana was a good place for a cattle ranch. So we gathered up a herd of cattle and drove them up here. And I ain’t got anywhere else to go.” He said with a shrug.

I smiled and took his hand. “Well, that’s a good reason to stay then.”

He smiled at my touch. “I suppose so.” He said, just looking at me for a minute. “Tell me about your friend.”

I smiled. “Gerry?” I asked and he nodded. “Gerry’s a sweet guy.” I said, thinking it over for a minute so I didn’t mention the salmon skinny jeans or the fact he dated frequently. “He’s very kind. He likes clothes. He works at a clothes store.” Fashion design studio, clothes store, same thing right? “He likes to listen to me talk for no reason. I think it’s silly sometimes. But I’ll sit there and talk about my day or how I think people are rude, and he’ll just sit there and nod.” I said with a smile, realizing how much I really missed him.

“He sounds like a good guy.” Newt said.

I nodded. “He’s amazing.” I said and saw the look on Newt’s face darken a fraction. “And I mean you should see his girlfriend. She’s really pretty and nice. He’s lucky to have her.” I said, making it up on the spot.

Newt seemed to perk up just a bit. “Oh.” He said, trying not to look relieved.

I smiled. Dish was right. Newt did like me. I couldn’t help but try to hide my smile as I stood to check the biscuits. “Biscuits are almost done. Would you go get the boys?” I asked him.

“Yes ma’am.” He said, standing up.

“Newt?” I asked and he turned back to me. “Why do you call me ma’am?”

Newt seemed to think about it for a moment. “Captain Call and Gus always told me that a man should always respect a woman. Even if she’s hard to be around, or even if she’s the best thing you even saw. Always respect a woman.” He said, repeating words he’d obviously been told many, many times.

I nodded, thinking it over when he nodded a bit to me and left the cabin. I put the fried deer meat on the table and was about to pull the Dutch oven from the coals when the guys came back into the cabin, looking tried from the day’s work.

The smell of the meat seemed to perk them up a bit though as they sat down and I brought over the pan of biscuits. After they finished dinner, they slowly filtered out to the deck. “Ma’am, how about that dancin’ lesson?” Dish asked as I started picking up the dishes.

I smiled at him. “As soon as I’m done with these plates.” I said, picking up the tub.

“Well,” He started. “I’ll do all those dishes if you’ll dance with me first.”

I smiled and shook my head. “Now, Mr. Boggett, your work for the day is done. You relax. After I do these dishes and stoke the fire, then my work is done too and we can dance til you can’t feel your feet anymore.”

He gave me a little sideways smirk. “You aren’t trying to get out of it, are ya?”

I shook my head at him. “I told you after all the chores are done and my chores are not yet done. I’m sure Newt would teach you if you asked pretty please.” I said with a wink at Newt as I opened the door. “I’m afraid he can only lead though and if he teaches you, he’d be teaching you to follow.”

“I suppose I can wait then.” Dish said, looking a bit embarrassed in front of the other guys.

“I suppose that’d be best.” I said, carrying the tub down the steps.

“Do you need help ma’am?” Newt asked.

“If you’d like.” I said, turning to him a little bit.

He came over and took the tub of dishes from me and we walked down to the lake as the sun was beginning to set. “Was Dish being rude?”

I smiled at him, my arm around his elbow. “Not at all. He asked me to teach him to dance. I told him after the chores were done and he was trying to talk me into it before I was done with dishes. Well the dishes are my chore, which means chores aren’t done yet.”

Newt nodded. “That’s true.” He said, sitting next to me while I rolled up the sleeves and started washing plates. “Do you miss where you came from?”

I looked over at him for just a moment. “Yeah. I do.” I said, feeling the pressure of my loss setting on my shoulders.  I missed Gerry and his boyfriends. I missed Danny and my fish and chips on Friday night. I missed having a job that I went to. I missed my jeans and heels and t-shirts.

“Do you wish you could go back?” He asked.

I felt like this question was a double-sided question. Did I want to go back? Of course I did. Did I want to leave him and the ranch? I couldn’t think of any reason why I would want to. “That’s a hard question to answer, Newt.” I told him, focusing on the dishes.

“Whys that?” He asked, picking at the grass.

“I miss being home, but I don’t know that I wouldn’t miss being here. Does that make sense?” I asked, but he looked a bit confused. “Like, I miss being home because I’m here. But I think if I went home, I’d miss being here.”

He nodded, seeming to understand this version of my logic. “I miss Lonesome Dove every once in a while. But I don’t think I’d want to go back. Especially not by myself.” He said.

I smiled a little. “I don’t think I could travel that far, with or without someone.”

He nodded. “It was a hard trip. We lost Jake Spoon and Deets and Paul, this Irish boy we met. And then Gus got shot with an arrow and it got infected and it killed him. Captain Call took him all the way back to Texas to be buried.”

I looked up at him in surprise. “Did he really?”

Newt nodded. “We got here right before the winter came. We just built the cabin when the first snow fell. And when the spring came, Captain Call left and took Gus back to Texas.”

“That’s quite a feat.” I said, turning back to the plates.

He nodded. “Don’t know that I could’ve done that.”

I smiled. “I’m sure if you were compelled by an honor as strong as Captain Call’s, you would. If you knew Dish or Needle your own entire life and they asked you to be laid to rest elsewhere, I’m sure you would.” I said, finishing up the dishes and stacking them in the tub. Newt picked it up before I could get a good grip on it. “You’re pretty handy to have around.” I joked, running my arm through his elbow. “This doesn’t bother you, does it?”

“Not at all, ma’am.” He told me.

I smiled as we started up the hill to the house. The last few rays of sun came from over the mountains. By the time we got back to the house, the sun had gone behind the mountains and there were two lit lanterns hanging on the porch. I let go of Newt’s arm before we got to the house.

“I coulda helped with that.” Dish said as he saw Newt carrying the tub of dishes.

“Yes, you could have.” I tossed out as Newt carried the tub in and set it on the table. I quickly put the dishes away, hoping Dish wasn’t upset at me. I hadn’t meant to be rude, but he was being ornery.  “Are you ready for that lesson, Mr. Boggett?” I asked, coming back to the porch.

“Lesson?” Call asked.

I nodded. “I taught Newt and Needle to dance. Dish wanted to know if I’d teach him too.”

“Not doing that instead of chores, are ya?” Call asked, looking at Newt.

“No sir. We only did it after dinner and it was dark.” Newt said.

“Don’t reckon I’ve ever seen Newt or Needle dance much.” Pea Eye said.

I smiled and held my hand out for Newt. He stood up and walked with me to the little patch of dirt in front of the porch. “Do you remember the steps?” I asked him and he modestly nodded. “Still want me to hum?”

“Yes ma’am, if you could.” He said, bashfully.

I figured he felt a little nervous because he was doing this in front of the other guys and didn’t want to be made fun of. I smiled at him. “Whenever you want, ok?” I said quietly as I started humming. It took him only a minute to catch his bearings before he took his first step. I followed him easily as he led me in a circle. This time, he didn’t focus on something behind me, or at my shoulder; this time he watched me as I hummed and he danced me in a circle.

After a pass or two, I smiled at him. “It gets easier the more you do it.” I told him.

He smiled and ducked his head a bit as he slowed us to a stop. “Ain’t hard at all.” He said, clearing his throat and looking up at Dish.

“See. Newt learned just fine.” I said, holding my hand out for him.

Dish came to stand in front of me. I moved to the side of him and showed him the three steps I had showed Needle and Newt. Dish picked up the steps faster than Newt had. “Why’d you hum to Newt?” He asked me.

I looked up at him and smiled a little. “I tried counting, but he kept stumbling. I tried humming and he could keep the rhythm like that. But when I taught Needle, he did fine when I just counted it off.”

Dish nodded, obviously not sure what to say. I could tell he had the same nervousness that Newt had. He lived with these men every day. He didn’t want to be embarrassing himself in front of them. I understood that, but as much as I liked these guys, I didn’t care much of what they thought of me one way or another.

“Ok, so I taught you your steps. That’s how you lead. Now my steps are opposite yours.” I told him and he nodded. I took his hands and arranged them where they ought to be. He looked a bit uncomfortable. “Is this ok?”

He nodded.

“So on three, start dancing and I’ll follow. Ok?” I asked and he nodded again. “One, two, three.” I said and he took his first step fine, then looked down and stumbled the next two.

“You forgot to tell him not to look down.” Newt reminded me.

“Shoot. I did.” I said, giving Dish an apologetic look. “That was my fault.” I said, despite the fact he looked confused. “Ok, you have to focus on something else. Your head knows the steps, but if you look down or focus on them too much, you’ll lose track like we just did. So think about something happy. Your horse, the sunset, a girl you like.”

“But how am I gonna know where to go if I don’t watch my feet?” He asked.

I smiled. “They’ll know exactly what to do if you let them. The hard part is letting them. So just think about anything happy. If that doesn’t work, I’ll hum for you.” I said.

Dish nodded. “You’ll count again?” He asked.

“Of course. Ready?” I asked. He nodded and I counted to three. His first three steps were so fluid, it startled me. I’d never taught anyone who’d learned so quickly. Dancing with Dish was an experience. He led so gracefully, you’d think he’d been dancing his whole life. “Mr. Boggett, you lied right to my face.” I said with a smile.

He looked a bit bashful. “I hope you forgive me for that.” He said. “My mom gave me lessons when I was a kid. Never really had much use for them.”

I shook my head, still smiling a bit. “All you had to do was ask and I’d have said yes.”

He ducked his head a bit. “I wanted to see how you taught. Newt does pretty well.”

“Well, thank you. I about landed in the dirt with him.” I said as Dish still danced me around.

“Yeah, but Needle did land you in the dirt.” Newt said with a bit of a smile.

“Hey now. I hadn’t meant to.” Needle said, even though he smiled.

Dish stopped us and gave a little bow. Trying not to laugh, I gave him a small curtsy. He returned to his place on the porch as Captain Call stood up. “Suppose I’m a bit rusty, but I’ll never turn down a chance to dance with a pretty lady.” He said with the first smile I’d seen from him.

“I wouldn’t have pegged you for a dancing man, Captain.” I said as he took my hand and set his other high on my waist.

He took his first step before he started talking, probably giving me time to get in rhythm with him. “Gus and I were invited in a Governor’s Ball when we were Rangers. Gus, as much as he loved women, couldn’t keep step to save his life.” He said.

“I bet you danced with a few pretty ladies.” I said, trying to imagine a younger Captain Woodrow Call.

He thought about it for a moment. “Two, as I recall; The Governor’s wife, and the wife of a ranch owner from Arkansas.”

I couldn’t help but smile. “I bet you were full of charm and panache.”

Woodrow gave me the smallest smile. “I’ve never been for much of either, ma’am.”

“I doubt that, sir.” I told him as he slowed us to a stop.

Call took a very tiny bow before returning to the rocker on the porch.

I looked up at the waxing crescent moon and the stars surrounding it. Tonight, my mood was the exact opposite was last night. I wasn’t tired; I wanted to stay up and dance and look at the stars all night. Maybe I just felt safer with the other men home.

When I looked back at the porch, Newt stood in front of me again. We took hands and he led me in a circle with ease. I hadn’t even started humming. Normally, I could zone out the other men so I just heard a buzz instead of the chatter and the laughs.

But this time, with Newt, I forgot it all. I couldn’t hear them talking or the buzz of zoning them out. I couldn’t hear the laughs or the cattle grazing. I just saw Newt and how the pale moonlight looked against his skin. He smiled for a reason I couldn’t figure out, but I didn’t care at that moment. I smiled back at him, ducking my head just a bit.

“What’s got you all smiley?” I asked, looking back up at him.

“I think you’re gorgeous.” Newt said quietly.

I ducked my head again. “I think you’re silly.”

He smiled a little bit. “I thought you might say that.”

“How’s that?” I asked.

He just shrugged a little and didn’t say anymore. But he didn’t have to. I felt this spark of electricity dance across my skin as we swayed, like we were connected. I couldn’t help but imagine all the things destiny had in store for us. We were entwined and I wasn’t sure if I’d ever know for what purpose.

But I was ok with that. I just danced until I heard a noise that broke my trance. I stopped and looked over at the porch.

Needle, Pea Eye, Dish, and Jasper sat there, looking at us kind of funny. What? It wasn’t like we’d lifted off the ground. We just danced. “I reckon these boys best be off to bed and you too, ma’am. It’s a few hours ride into town. You’ll need a sound bit of sleep.” Woodrow said to us.

“Right.” I said with a nod as I let go off Newt. But the strangest sensation happened when I let go of him. It was like a cold wind rushing over me. As if Newt had fed a fire inside of me and letting go of him suddenly made it go out. I was left feeling tired and cool all over. “Thank you, Mr. Dobbs.” I said.

“Night ma’am.” He said with a nod as I continued up the steps. I about had a heart attack when Jasper looked at me, but he said nothing and I came to stand next to Captain Call as the boys headed for the barn.

Woodrow looked deep in thought as I set my hand on his shoulder and he looked up at me. “Thank you for a lovely evening. I’m excited to go into town tomorrow.” I told him.

He nodded. “I expect so.” He said briefly.

“I don’t know if it’s odd for me to ask,” I started.

“I’ll be sleeping on the porch here tonight, unless you have any objections.” Call said to me.

I almost sighed with relief. “Not at all. Thank you Captain.” I said, retreating to the cabin. I stoked the fire and curled up on the floor with my blanket and pulling my hoodie close for a pillow.


	7. The One with Shopping

I slept barely better than I had the night before. I got a few hours of restless sleep that left me just as tired as before I went to bed. I spent what I would have guessed to be nearly an hour just staring at the fire. I was too excited and nervous to go to sleep. I yawned, but drifted back to sleep for a few hours.

When I woke up again, the first little hints of pink and red were reaching the sky. I started a pot of water boiling for the coffee. I found some fatty pieces off the deer that had been well fed and threw it in with the rest of the bacon. I now knew why we were going to town today. I couldn’t imagine the complaining I’d hear for feeding a group of men without meat. At least not this bunch.

When the meat was halfway done, I added coffee to the boiling water. It had seeped for a few minutes before I poured a cup and took a glance out the window. Captain Call was sitting on the edge of the porch, watching the sun rise.

I pulled open the door and walked over to him, holding the coffee out. He gave a very quiet thank you as he took the cup. I returned inside and shivered, a cold wisp running down my spine. I threw another log on the fire as the bacon finished up. I put the Dutch oven in the coals and mixed up biscuits while it warmed.

Woodrow came into the cabin as I retrieved the pot from the fire and added the biscuits. I returned it to the blaze and looked over at the Captain. “You’ve got a good bunch of boys there.” I told him as I came to sit across from him.

He nodded. “Better than most.”

“And this ranch is quite a legacy to leave, if you think about it.” I said.

He nodded again. “I suppose the boys’ll run it just fine after I’ve died.” He said and it was quiet for a long time. “Might be better if we had someone here to help with the household things.”

I pulled my gaze from the fire surrounding the cast iron pot to look over at him. “Such an interesting statement.”

He quirked his lips, not quite smiling at the table. “Suppose so.”

“If I may be so bold, was that an invitation to stay?” I asked.

He thought about it for a moment and I realized he was a man of few words. I had been surprised last night about the story of him and his friend Gus getting lessons for a Governor’s Ball. “Suppose so.” He said.

I smiled. “Well, I’d love to. You’ll have to make other accommodations for me though.” And he looked up surprised; probably thinking I wanted something nicer or more complicated. “So your men can have their house back. I’d hate to put you out in the cold any longer.”

Woodrow shook his head but said nothing. I took this to mean he had already thought this over. I figured he probably had some sort of a plan and if he wanted to tell me, he would at some point.

I stood to check the biscuits and relayed to him they were almost done. As I started frying eggs, the guys filed in and poured their coffee before sitting down around the table. Pea Eye, Needle and Dish still looking half asleep while Newt looked as awake as Call did.

Breakfast went pretty fast and as soon as I cleaned up a bit, Call told me to head out to the stable and the boys would take me into town. When I got out to the stable, Newt and Needle had only one horse saddled and two other off to the side. Needle led the two stray horses out of the barn and around the side to where a wagon sat.

I placed my hands on my hips when Newt came over to me. “I spent all day yesterday on a horse so you could put me in a wagon today?”

Newt ducked his head a bit. “Well, you at least know how to ride a horse if you need and I’ll give ya more lessons until you can get the real hang of it.” He told me.

I shook my head at him and asked Needle if he needed any help. He declined and I stood there, watching him and Newt hook the horses up.

After a few minutes, Newt and I were sitting on the wagon as Needle rode ahead of us on his horse. “So how long does it usually take to get to town?” I asked him.

He thought about it for a moment. “Couple hours, I reckon.” He said.

I nodded and for the next two hours we talked off and on, Needle would sometimes fall back to talk a bit. It was pleasant. And I wasn’t sure what I was expecting when we got to town, but I wasn’t expecting it to look like it just came out of the movies.

All the roads were dirt, all of the wooden buildings were simply ordained, and a sign at the edge of the town, tacked to a wooden post, announced the name to a traveler who might not know where they’d ended up.

I smiled, seeing the wood boardwalk that linked business on each side of the road. “It’s cute.” I said, to no one in particular, but Newt smiled at my reaction. When we got into town, Newt pulled the wagon in front of a general store and parked it.

Needle wrapped his reins around a post to keep his horse from wandering and Newt helped me out of the wagon seat. Newt and Needle talked for a moment but I was so absorbed in watching the goings-on with the town, I barely registered that they were talking.

“You ready, ma’am?” Newt asked, holding his arm out to me.

I looked over at him with a smile. “Of course, Mr. Dobbs. Where are we off to if Needle is getting our goods?” I asked him as I took his arm.

He ducked his head, suddenly bashful. “I was told not to say, as you might not let me.”

I looked at him oddly; suddenly worried we were headed for the local inn. But I had faith in Newt, so I let him lead me down the boardwalk to a little shop. He held open the door for me and I was nearly stopped dead at the entrance.

It was a little boutique; store just wasn’t the right word for the set up this building had. There were dresses along every wall; little bits of fabric stuck out in stacks every now and then. There were coats, hats and scarves on racks in the middle of the floor.

“Newt, what on earth are we doing?” I asked him.

“Good morning. What can I help you with?” The lady behind the counter said with a big smile.

Newt smiled at me, before turning to the lady. “The miss needs a few new dresses. I was hoping you could help us.” He said as he slipped his hat off his head.

I just looked at Newt. “I don’t need new clothes.”

He didn’t say anything, just gave me a look that quieted me. The lady came around the counter with a measuring tape around her neck and she reminded me very strongly of Gerry. The few times I had brought lunch to Gerry, instead of the reverse, he also had a measuring tape around his neck while he walked back and forth around the studio. It had always humored me.

“You have very lovely proportions.” She said as she asked me to hold my arms up. She did three quick measurements, then stood there thinking. “Do you have any fabric preferences?” She asked, looking me in the eye.

I was still taken back by the fact I was even in the shop. “Um, no. I don’t like wool much.” I said and she smiled.

“Well, then you’re in luck. I just got in a batch of a new cotton blend from down south of Boston. It’s like wearing a dream.” She said with a smile as she headed for the opposite wall and began digging through dresses.

I turned to Newt, who was still standing close by. “Newt. I don’t have any money for clothes.” I said, trying to keep my voice down. I’d feel bad to try on a bunch of clothes I couldn’t buy.

He waved his hand dismissively.

The lady brought back three dresses. “These are all your dimensions so they should fit heavenly.” She said with a smile as she waved me to come over. I had missed the curtain that hung behind the counter, but she pulled it back for me to reveal a dressing room of sorts behind another curtain. “My name is Angelica, so you know.” She told me.

I smiled at her. “I’m Selene.”

Her brilliantly white teeth made me think she had come from elsewhere. “Such a pretty name. Would you like help getting this off?” She asked, her fingers dancing along the hem of the pale green dress.

“Yes, please. I played hell just trying to get it on.” I said.

She smirked in a way that made me think she heard that a lot. First, she pulled a yellow number over my head. As soon as I looked at myself in the mirror that hung on the wall, I shook my head. Yellow was definitely not my color. It washed me out.

When I told her my concerns with the garment, she nodded and helped me off with it. The next one was green, but darker in color than the one I had previously worn. This one was more forest green than pastel. She held back the curtain for me and I stepped out of the second curtain and rounded the counter so Newt could appraise me.

He immediately stood when he saw me.

“What do you think?” I asked, spinning for him. I had gotten in the habit of twirling while trying on clothes when Gerry brought home something new he’d thought I’d like.

“It’s… it makes you… it’s real…” He stuttered, tripping over his words as he ran his fingers over his hat brim.

“Is that a yes?” I asked, trying to help him out.

He smiled, examining the wood grain for just a moment. “Yes ma’am.”

I smiled at him and passed the two curtains to the back of the dressing room.

“He’s cute. How long have you been together?” She asked as she helped me take off the green dress and put it on another hanger.

Angelica’s question took me off guard. “Oh, Newt? We’re not… courting. I mean, he’s lovely. But we’ve only known each other a couple days.”

She smiled at me. “I met my husband when he stumbled out of a saloon and tripped me. I was furious with the man. But the next day he came and apologized after one of his friends told him of his behavior. We were married the following Sunday.”

I looked at her in surprise. “I had once been courting a man for eight months and my mother was shocked when I told her we were thinking about getting married.”

Angelica smiled. “Matters of the heart know nothing of time.”

I thought about it for a moment, while she helped me put on a red number. “Do you really think that?” I asked her finally.

She smiled at me. “I’ve been with my husband for nearly fifteen years now. Few others in the area can claim the same experience. I think if you love someone, you shouldn’t hide it.”

I nodded, looking at myself in the mirror. The red dress fit like a glove. It made me feel strong and confident. I tried to keep my hopes down, in case for some reason Newt didn’t like it. I wanted to believe he would like it, but I didn’t want to disappoint myself if he didn’t. So I held my breath as Angelica held the curtain and I walked around the counter to stand in front of Newt.

He rose very slowly out of the chair and just stood there, mouth ajar just a bit. He didn’t stutter or stumble over his words, which bothered me a little. “Does it look that bad?” I asked, suddenly overcome with a drastic sense of worry for my new favorite dress.

It must have taken a moment for my words to sink in because a minute later, he shook his head. “Not at all, ma’am.”

“So, you like it?” I asked, still slightly worried.

His eyes finally found their way up to meet mine, as they had been gazing at the rest of me. “It’s beautiful.”

I couldn’t help but smile. “Do you really think so? Because, if not I can just get the green one and we can go help Needle with the goods.” I said quickly, giving him one more out in case his stunned silence was in disgust.

Newt’s lips slowly formed a smile. “Do you like it?”

“Well, of course I do. I wouldn’t have shown it to you if I’d hated it.” I said, laughing a little to get rid of the nervous tension I was feeling.

“Then it’s perfect.” He told me, still rooted to the spot where he stood.

I couldn’t help it. I dashed over and gave him a hug, then I went back behind the counter. Angelica helped me out of the dress and back into the pale green one I’d arrived in.

She carried the green and red dress out for me, leaving the yellow one to put away later. “I believe you’ve made the young lady quite happy.” Angelica said, directing the comment to Newt as he came to stand by me.

He smiled, ducking his head briefly. “I’d reckon I did. I haven’t seen that smile since she got here earlier in the week.”

Angelica smiled. “And, I’m not sure whether you two are planning or anything, but I have a collection of wedding dresses going on sale soon. If I knew of any upcoming nuptials, I could hold, or even make one for you.” She said, looking between Newt and I.

We were both speechless. “We… aren’t… we aren’t getting married.” I said, even though I was pretty sure we’d gone over this a handful of minutes ago.

Angelica shrugged. “Nuptials are no joking matter. But when the time comes, I’m sure I could find or make you a gorgeous wedding dress.” She said with a wink.

“Ya aren’t getting anything else?” Newt asked with a quick glance around the store.

“Uh,” I started, not sure my answer to the question. “No, I don’t believe I need anything else.” I said as Angelica walked across the room.

“With the days getting longer and the weather warming up, every lady needs a hat of some sort.” She said, as she picked up what I would have called a black cowboy hat, with what looked like a looser brim. It was almost nearly identical to the one Newt kept playing with in his hands. She gave me a look that told me to just try it on. I sighed and did so. It actually didn’t look bad on me and Newt approved it.

“How much for the hat?” Newt asked.

She thought it over for a moment. “On the house, as long as you promise me you’ll come back when it’s time to get your wedding gown.”

I smiled at her. She was very sly, but not in the deceiving fashion. “If and when I get married, I’ll make sure to come back for my wedding dress.” I told her.

She smiled and clapped her hands together. She rang up our order and gave us the total, which Newt paid in full out of a money bag from his pocket. She waved goodbye as Newt carried out both boxes that each contained a dress.

“I don’t usually wear hats. But then again, I’m not often in the sun too long.” I said, more talking to myself than Newt.

“Good hat’s like a good horse. Can’t go wrong when ya got one.” He said and I smiled. Leave it to a cowboy to bring the topic back to horses.


	8. The One about Marriage

“Find anything interesting?” Needle asked, tossing a bag of flour into the back of the wagon.

“Newt bought me two dresses and a hat.” I told him, gesturing to the two boxes to set in the back. He then moved a few things around so the boxes wouldn’t fall out of the back.

Needle nodded as he wiped sweat off his brow with the edge of his sleeve. “Did I forget anything?” Needle asked Newt.

Newt looked over the goods. “Bacon?” He asked.

Needle looked horrified and jogged back into the building, away from the loading dock. After a moment he came back with a slab that could feed the Hat Creek Cattle Co. for a month. Well, I imagined, not quite that long, maybe. But it was one of the largest hunks of meat I’d seen in an awful long time.

Newt and Needle went inside to pay for the groceries, telling me they’d only be a moment. I didn’t mind; I liked the chance to people watch. It had been the main sport Gerry and I shared while we’d been living together. He hadn’t even known the term before I met him, but he made it such fun. We’d go sit at a mall or main thoroughfare and make up stories about who they were and what they did for a living.

I liked to make up reasonable guesses, like I could read the person. Gerry, however, enjoyed making up outlandish stories, as if they were the Prince of Nigeria who enjoyed all things Hello Kitty or the Half Blood Queen of Agrabah who liked to re-create the moves in Flashdance.

It was easy to pretend Gerry was sitting next to me on the wagon bench, whispering in my ear how the plump lady crossing the street from the barber’s was a High Priestess for the Greek Gods, who had a box of Twinkie’s in her basket.

“Hey you.” A man called out and I didn’t realize he was talking to me until he started to walk towards me. “You daft?” He asked with an accent.

“Excuse me?” I asked, more because I wasn’t sure what he was asking.

“Are you daft?” He asked slowly, his Russian accent getting more pronounced.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about.” I said, glancing towards the loading dock and not finding either Newt or Needle close enough to see.

“You must be stupid or something. Whores belong in the saloon.” Another man said, coming to stand next to the first man, who then pointed across the street to the bar.

“I’m neither stupid, nor a whore. Your English is atrocious.” I said, hoping to confuse them with larger words.

They both looked confused for half a second before Newt stepped into their line of sight. “These men bothering you, Miss McCrae?” Needle asked from the back of the wagon.

“Not at all. They were just leaving.” I said with the coldest tone I could muster.

“You boys best get on then if you’re gettin’.” Newt said, never taking his eyes off the two Russian men.

They just scowled and walked across the street to the saloon they’d tried directing me to.

I sighed heavily when they left, not realizing I had been holding my breath.

“Can’t take you nowhere.” Needle said as he jumped out of the wagon then immediately jumped back on his horse.

“Honestly, I understand that.” I said as Newt released the break on the wagon and we headed out of town.

“You always save me.” I told Newt, leaning on his arm a bit. “My hero.”

He smiled, watching the road instead of replying. But I didn’t need a reply. I just needed him on the other side of the bench to lean on a bit on the ride back. We talked less on the way back, but it was a comfortable silence. I didn’t feel the need to fill it with chatter or non-sense.

When we crossed under the sign for the Hat Creek Cattle Company, we were met by the sight of the Captain, Dish, Pea Eye and Jasper.

Captain Call came over to help me out of the wagon. “Lovely hat.” He said briskly.

I didn’t say anything as they began unloading the goods. Most of them were stored in the barn and the men took them off.  Dish was kind enough to hand me my dress boxes though. I gave him a smile and carried the boxes inside and set them on the table. I ran my fingers over the boxes a few times before the door opened again. I picked the boxes up and set them in the corner opposite from the firewood, but on the same wall as the fireplace.

“Did you enjoy the trip to town?” Captain Call asked from the doorway.

“Yes, thank you Captain. And I very much appreciate the dresses.” I said, figuring the money hadn’t come from Newt directly. The captain nodded. “Should I start lunch then?” I asked.

“If you’d be so kind.” He said politely before leaving.

I then hung my hat on the hat rack and went about starting the beans cooking. I had just pulled the biscuits out of the fire when the boys filed in and set their hats on the hat rack.

“So when can we see those pretty dresses?” Needle asked as he scooped beans onto his spoon with his biscuit.

“Tomorrow, I expect.” I said before biting off some biscuit.

Needle, Newt and Dish seemed to feel this was an acceptable answer.

The rest of the day continued slowly until I went out to wash the dishes after dinner. The men sat on the porch, swapping stories and whiskey. I couldn’t stop thinking about the dresses. I loved both of them and was excited to show them off the next few days. I was halfway through the dishes when I realized I wanted to tell Gerry about them.

Suddenly, I was hit with a wall of sadness when I realized I wouldn’t be able to tell Gerry about it. Not ever if I couldn’t remember what to do when I had to go back in time. If I didn’t remember Gerry’s instructions, I’d never be able to tell him; about the dress, about the guys, about Newt.

He’d like to hear about Newt; I thought. Gerry was always trying to get me to go out with friends of his boyfriends and a friend of a friend of Omar’s. He’d like that I found a nice guy, even if we weren’t going together right now. And I’d get bonus points for a cowboy.

But the crushing thought of never seeing Gerry, my best friend, again, was terrifying. I forced myself to finish the dishes, but I had no strength to take them up the hill to the house. The sun was setting in the mountain range behind me, casting the world in shades of orange, pink and red.

I realized that I would’ve paid good money if I’d had it to get Gerry here. Or take me back, as much as I’d miss Newt and the guys. I sat there on the little hill, watching the life on the other side of the lake. A small herd of deer watered themselves until they heard a noise and bolted back into the forest.

If I looked out the corner of my eye, I could see Gerry sitting there in his salmon jeans, laughing at how silly he’d think they were acting by running when nothing was obviously chasing them. So when Newt sat down next to me, I was slightly startled.

“Captain and I was getting worried about you.” He said.

I nodded. “Well, I appreciate it. I’m fine. Just sitting here.” I said, probably a little too quickly to be convincing.

Newt nodded, like he hadn’t noticed the speed of my words, which I was sure he would have. “Somethin’ you wanna talk about?” He asked, a bit awkwardly.

I shook my head, starting to stand up. I picked up the tub before I realized I didn’t want to go back to the cabin and the company of the other five men. I liked being here on this hill with Newt, who hadn’t moved. I set the tub back down before setting myself down. I didn’t know if I wanted to talk to him, but I definitely didn’t want to talk to the other guys. “I miss Gerry.” I said simply.

Newt nodded. “I coulda figured as much.” He told me.

“I’m scared I’ll never see him again.” I added. To this remark though, he said nothing and it made me feel a little bit emptier then I already had. “What if he forgets me, Newt?” I asked, not really meaning to. “What if he finds a new best friend and forgets all about me.”

“How anyone in their right mind could forget someone like you is a wonder to me.” He said quietly while looking me in the eye.

I looked back across the lake and there was a long silence, where all we did was watch the retreating line of red and pink. After a while, I realized something was troubling Newt. About the time I was going to ask, he spoke up.

“Would you wanna marry me?” He asked, catching me off guard.

I thought about it for a moment. “I suppose I might.” I said. “Why do you ask?”

He was silent for a moment, making me think of Woodrow. “That lady at the store brought up wedding dresses and you got a kind of funny look on your face. And I wanted to know what you’d say if I did ask you.”

I nodded, still not sure about the subject. “I’m just not sure if I want to get married.”

“A respectable lady like you should have no problems with suitors.” He said, looking as if he wasn’t sure the word was correct.

“I don’t think that’d be a problem. I just don’t know about the business of getting married.” I said.

Newt was silent. Despite the lack of words between the two of us, I was hoping I hadn’t upset him. He seemed to like the idea of marrying me for some reason, but then the whole issue with Gerry was brought back to the front of my mind. I didn’t want to promise Newt anything I could follow through with and end up breaking his heart.

“Do you think if you love someone, time or distance shouldn’t matter?” I asked him, remembering the words Angelica had told me earlier.

“I don’t suppose it shouldn’t if you love somebody.” He said, standing up and holding his hand out to me. I took it and stood up. “I suppose if you love someone, you should just love them.” He said, picking up the tub.

I laced my arm and him and we started up the hill. Right before we rounded the corner of the cabin, I let go of Newt’s arm as he took my dishes inside.

“Took ya long enough. Were you neckin’ or what?” Jasper’s big mouth said from a corner of the porch.

My sadness about my situation allowed me to let the comment slide off my back, simply ignoring it all together. I could hear Call and Needle say something in forced hushes, but couldn’t make out the words. I let Newt return to the porch as I put dishes away. Then I moved to sit in front of the fire.

It wasn’t cold; I just sat there, gazing deep into the bed of coals. Watching the fire eased the pain in my chest that had started to make my head throb. I didn’t think about Gerry, or the dresses I couldn’t show him, or Newt, that I didn’t know about marrying. A song floated through my head and the singer’s voice in my ear whispered the whole song from beginning to end.

About the third time the song had replayed in my head, a hand touched my shoulder. I hadn’t heard anyone approach, but I wasn’t startled by it. I pulled my eyes from the fire to see who had touched me. Dish’s mouth moved twice before I realized he was talking to me.

“Yeah, yeah. I’m fine.” I said, glancing at the door for only a second. Captain Call stood at the doorjamb, Pea Eye and Newt watching through the cracks of the door. “Just thinking.”

“About what?” I heard from Dish as I looked back at the fire. All the problems that had ebbed away when I looked at the blaze in the hearth had flooded back into me.

“Men and dresses and time.” I said simply.

When someone sat down next to me, I was surprised that it was Captain Call. He didn’t seem like the kind to sit on the floor on purpose. “Tell me about the time first.” He said kindly. “If you want.”

When I looked at the door, Dish was gone and the door was closed. “I don’t understand how time works.” I said, hoping I wasn’t getting too much into philosophy. “It’s always moving, but you look around and it’s been five years.  You don’t remember how, but everything changes. You lost people and things; you gained other people and things. I don’t understand how it can do that to us.” I said, feeling all the sadness of Gerry swell in my chest.

Captain Call sat next to me for so long without saying anything, I’d feared he’d somehow got up and left. “If you’d ask me; five years ago, I was a ranger with Gus and Deets and Pea Eye and Jake Spoon.” He said, finally. “Last month, I had moved to Lonesome Dove with Gus. Yesterday, I’d decided that we best run cattle up to Montana.” He said and I looked over at him. “But I haven’t been a ranger in more than ten years. I lived in Lonesome Dove about the same time. And we’ve been on this ranch settled for a year and it took almost a year to get here.”

I just watched the fire, thinking about what he’d said.

“Tell me about the dresses.” Woodrow said.

“I love the dresses. I just wish I could tell my friend about them. He loves clothes, but I’m scared I’ll never see him again.” I said, realizing it was easier to talk to Call when I was focusing on the fire.

“And the men?” He asked, obviously trying to tread carefully as he said it.

“Newt asked me what I thought about marrying him.” I told him, but he said nothing. “I think I’d like to marry Newt, if we could work it out. I mean, we couldn’t live here. We’d need our own space. But he’s a good man and he’d make a good husband, I’m sure. I just don’t know how I feel about marrying him.”

Captain Call seemed to mill over what I said before he answered. “He’s just like his mother. She loved with everything she had and then some.” He said, seeming to say this with a regret I couldn’t quite understand.

“You loved her, Newt’s mom.” I said quietly, hoping I hadn’t broken a forbidden taboo.

He just nodded, not saying one thing or another. And for a while, we just sat there together, not talking, not moving. Then, he stood up and bid me goodnight. The boys had moved away from the porch, probably back to the barn. I didn’t know how late it had gotten, staring at the fire talking about things we couldn’t fix. And there were a lot of them as I thought it over; my loss of Gerry, which I wasn’t sure if I could fix or not, my aversion to marriage, and Woodrow’s loss of Newt’s mother. 

I sighed, pulling the blanket around me and fell into a restless sleep that I couldn’t shake.


	9. The One about Storms

The next morning, my eyes felt heavy. I went through the motions of making coffee, frying bacon, starting biscuits, frying eggs. I hardly noticed when the men sat at the table with their coffee cups looking tired, or when they thanked me for breakfast, complimented my dress and filed out the front door.

I did notice that a big cloud covered the sun when I went to do dishes and I did notice the men watch me carefully. But I couldn’t be bothered. The more I thought of Gerry, the more unsettled I felt. It was as if a piece of me had been pulled out of me.

The next week passed like this. I was saddened by a thing I could neither fix, nor explain to the men when they asked. I knew they were concerned about me and I knew that Newt most of all wanted to help me with whatever I was struggling through. But I couldn’t tell him I was a time traveler that might never see her gay best friend again.

I didn’t figure that would play over well in 1877 Montana.

When I woke up, I hardly even noticed that the rain was starting to come down in a drizzle.  The dream I had the night before clung in my mind. I was on top of a very high building. It had been so high; I could hardly see the ground through the black and gray storm clouds that had surrounded the building. I was in my pale green dress and I was crying. I heard myself say, “I’m sorry. I’m so sorry.”

Then I stepped off the roof of the building and crashed into the ground below, leaving me in a heap. The dream felt familiar, as if I’d had it before and I spent the better half of the morning thinking about it. Then it came back in a rush to me. Gerry, the time travel, the plan to get back if I ever got through, and the dream. Gerry had told me almost every time he thought the storm was the real thing.

The only way to get back was when a storm rolled in, twelve days after when you got there. This is why he reasoned that there was a storm somewhere in the world every twelve days. He’d even done some advanced calculation and showed to me to prove his theory. But I had to jump from a building at least three stories tall to get back.

A loud clash of thunder nearly made my heart stop and I looked out the window to see a lightning storm move in. The men quickly finished their work before they came into the cabin.

“Don’t suppose I’ve seen a storm this wild in a while.” I said blandly as I looked out the window.

The guys seemed surprised by my remark, all agreeing. Newt came to stand next to me as he looked out the window at the lightning and his hand slipped into mine.

It was a small gesture, but I realized I’d been a zombie the last week. Newt deserved better, even if I hadn’t known I was doing it. I firmly took his hand, hoping he thought I was scared by the storm. I’d have actually liked to go sit in the open field below the house, but I doubted any of the men would allow that.

“How are you feeling?” Newt asked quietly as the other men took off their wet things and hung them to dry.

“A little better, I’d think. I’m sorry for my behavior.” I said, trying not to look at him.

He just shook his head a bit.

By the time the sun set, the storm was directly over the cabin. A few of the men whispered about a tornado sweeping the house away. But it was just blowing wind and spitting rain. I tried to talk Captain Call into letting the men sleep in the house, but he informed me that wasn’t right for a company of men to sleep in the same room as a woman.

When it came time for bed, the men put on their rain gear and ran from the cabin to the barn. Newt lingered for a moment, until Dish, who had gone in front of him, disappeared into the barn. He hesitated for a moment, but then suddenly leaned forward and kissed me.

For a moment, I didn’t quite know what was happening. But then my body responded by kissing him back and pulling him closer.

He broke the kiss with a smile as big as Texas itself. “Night ma’am.” He said and dashed off to the barn through the rain.

I watched him until he disappeared into the shadows of the stable. I was taken off guard by his actions, but I definitely enjoyed it. I smiled to myself.

Then a flash of lightning hit a tree on the hill behind the lake. But in that flash, I saw a figure on top of the barn, then it disappeared. I stood for a moment, straining my eyes to try and see it.

The realization was scary. The person I’d seen on top of the barn was me. Or it was supposed to be, at least. The barn was the only thing for miles that was at least three stories tall. If I fell off the barn into the storm, it’d take me back to Gerry. I took a deep breath and went back into the cabin. I had all night to get to the top of the barn.  But I’d have to wait until the guys fell sleep.

I changed into my pale green dress, so that when time reversed back, the lady at the shop would still have her green and red dress. I sat there in front of the fire, watching it, waiting for the right time. The storm seemed to be getting more and more violent.

It felt like a long time had passed, despite the fact there was no clock to mark time for me. I put my hoodie on over the dress and pulled on my neon converse. I grabbed a square of cloth that was once a table cloth and tied it up to carry my shirt and jeans.  With a deep breath, I opened the door to the cabin and gently closed it behind me, even though the lightning storm that raged around us was ten times louder than the door closing.

But I knew what I had to do. I pulled up my hood and dashed across the murky courtyard to the side of the barn. I waited for a moment, making sure the guys hadn’t seen me. Then I walked alongside the barn, trying to find the ladder to the roof. On the backside of the barn, there were wood footholds attached to the outside wall. I took hold of them and pulled myself up onto the roof.

I made a bit of noise as I fell onto the roof but I doubted with the wind and rain and thunder that anyone would notice. I was nearing the edge of the roof when I heard my name. I ignored it, figuring it was my imagination. But when I heard it again, I looked around. Newt, in all his rain gear, stood in the middle of the roof.

He looked confused when he came over to me. “What are you doing?” He yelled above the storm as he looked me over.

“Newt, I’m sorry. But I have to go home.” I told him.

“What are you doing on the roof?” He asked, seeming to ignore my previous remark.

“I have to go home. I’m sorry, Newt.” I told him, stepping closer to the edge.

He quickly grabbed the sleeve of my hoodie and pulled me to him. “You might slip and fall.” He said, looking concerned.

I was at a crossroads, but my choice was obvious. “Newt, I time traveled.” I said and watched the confusion grow on his face. “I fell through time and landed here. Where I’m from, it’s 2013. My clothes were funny when I came here because it’s a different time. And now it’s time to go home.” I told him.

His face looked saddened. “I’ll take you back to Denver, I promise. Just come down off this roof.”

I couldn’t help it; I started tearing up. “Newt. I have to go into the storm to go home.”

He just shook his head. “I can’t let you do that.”

“Do you love me?” I asked suddenly and he froze. “Yes.” He said without hesitation. “Then you have to let me do this. You have to trust me.” I told him.

He shook his head again and his grip on me loosened. I hated what I was about to do. I stood up on my tippy toes to kiss him and broke it suddenly, throwing myself over the edge.

Newt caught my hand before I fell and he hung on tightly, trying to pull me up.

“Newt, please.” I begged. “Let go.”

“I can’t let you die.” He told me, holding on tightly. He tried to pull me up, but the roof was slick from the blowing rain and wind. He looked panicked as my hand started slipping out of his. The drop I felt when I fell out of his grip was scary, but the last thing I saw before I was thrown around was Newt.

I felt like I was bouncing around a dryer that was colder and wetter, but then I landed against something hard. I groaned at the pain. I opened my eyes to see a dumpster; the dumpster that sat under my fire escape. I franticly looked up to see Gerry standing on the fire escape above, looking stunned into silence.

Another groan made me look around. Newt laid next to me in the dumpster.

“Newt! What did you do?” I all but screeched.

He looked startled to be in a big metal container. “I couldn’t let you die.”

“I didn’t die. I can’t believe you fell off the barn.” I said, standing up in the dumpster and giving him my hand to help him up. He looked around confused. I took a hold of the dumpster and pulled myself up so that the top of it was even with my rib cage, then I flipped forward and out onto the side of the alley.

Newt tried to clumsily follow my moves.

“Grab that bar. You’re taller than me.” I told him and he took hold of it and pulled it down. I scurried up the fire escape, Newt close behind me. When I was on the same expanse of metal as Gerry, I flung my arms around him. “Gerry! I was scared I’d never see you again. I landed on a cattle ranch in Montana in 1877. This is Newt, he’s a cowboy. They taught me to make biscuits and ride a horse. They even took me into town and bought me two dresses that were so pretty, but I didn’t want to wear them back here. And I’m serious. I rode a horse for real. I’ve been cooking all their food for the last twelve days and I was so worried.” I said, all on one breath.

Gerry’s eyes were the size of a dinner plate. He slowly turned to Newt, who looked so confused. “Newt. It’s nice to meet you. I’m Gerry.”

Newt shook his hand. “I’ve heard about you.”

Gerry just turned to me, taking in my appearance. “You did it.”

But I quickly shook my head. “You did it, Gerry. You said so.”

The next words out of his mouth scared me. “You have to go back.”

I just gapped at him. “Gerry… what? No. I can’t leave you. I struggled this entire last week because I was scared I’d never see you again. I can’t leave you again.” I told him, holding his hand.

He smiled genuinely at me, cupping my face in his other hand. “You got a fine cowboy and some nice clothes. No reason to leave that for me.”

“Gerry.” I said and he hugged me.

“Write me.” He said and I looked at him confused. “Write me about it and tell the postman to not deliver it until tomorrow’s date. April 15th, 2013.” He said with a smile.

I shook my head. “But James and Danny and football and ice cream.” I said, recalling just the events that had happened in this one day.

Gerry smiled. “What about love? Football is not a good replacement for love.”

I looked back at Newt, who still looked confused, but now he was looking concerned. “You said you loved me.” I said, meaning it more of a question.

He gently took my hand and nodded. “I did.”

As I stood there, looking between the two men, I knew what I had to do; I just didn’t know how. “Gerry.” I said quietly and he hugged me once more. Then he unzipped my hoodie and pulled it off my shoulders, taking the little table cloth from me that held my other clothes.

“Write me. Every week write me something. Even if it’s silly.” He said with a smile.

I nodded, then turned back to Newt. I took Newt’s hand. He leaned over and kissed me on the check and I couldn’t help but smile. As much as I was going to miss Gerry, now I needed Newt. “Are you ready to go back?” I asked him.

He took a moment to reply, just looking at me and Gerry, then the city skyline he could see from the fire escape. Then he nodded.

I turned back to Gerry. “I’m going to miss you so much.”

He smiled. “I know, honey bee.” He said as he and Newt helped me climb over the railing. Newt then followed me and the rain pounded heavily on the alley below us. I turned to look at Gerry one last time. “I love you, Gerry.”

“I know. I love you too.” He said, then set his hand on Newt’s shoulder. “You take care of her. Promise me.”

Newt smiled. “I promise.”

“Ok, go. Hurry, hurry before I start crying.” Gerry said.

I looked at Newt and we held hands. “On three, ok?” I asked and he nodded. “One, two, three.” I said and we both pushed off, away from the railing. It felt like we ended up back in the dryer as we tumbled, but I held fast to Newt. I didn’t want to end up in another time then he did.

Then I hit my head on something solid and wet and I groaned loudly. When I opened my eyes, I landed a few feet from Newt, who looked around to see where we were. It took me a minute, but I realized we had ended up where I had started.

“Newt,” I said, pointing in the direction of the light in the distance. “That’s the porch light I saw when I found your cabin.”

He stood up, helping me up as the wind blew wildly. Newt took off his jacket and wrapped it around my shoulders, trying to protect me from the onslaught of windblown rain. We forced our way through the rain until we got to the cabin. I was going to knock, remembering that to them, I’d never actually been here. But I forgot that Newt lived here, so he just pushed the door open.

I stepped through, shivering as he closed the door.

“Newt, where on earth-“ Captain Call started, before he spotted me. “Ma’am.” He said, standing from his chair.

I nodded a little. I couldn’t stop my teeth from chattering and my hands were shaking so bad I couldn’t hold them still. I didn’t realize how cold I was until Newt handed me a blanket to wrap around my shoulders. “I appreciate the hospitality.” I said, pulling off Newt’s wet jacket and handing it to him before I wrapped the blanket around me.

“You’re a long way from civilization, Miss.” Captain Call said as he looked between Newt and I. “Newt, you have anything to say for this?”

“I took a walk around the fence border and saw her wandering around in the storm. She said she got turned around and her horse ran away.” He said, coming up with a brilliant cover story.

“What’s your name ma’am?” Woodrow asked me.

“Selene McCrae.” I told him, holding out my hand.

“Captain Woodrow F. Call.” He said, giving my hand a brief shake after an odd look in my direction. “This here’s Pea Eye Parker, Jasper Fant, Dish Boggett, Needle Nelson, and you’ve already met Newt Dobbs.”

“Well, Captain Call. I really appreciate you and your men taking me in.” I said, looking between the guys.

“If you don’t mind me sayin’, ma’am, it’s awfully silly to be traveling in this kind of weather.” He told me.

“Well, someone in town said the weather wouldn’t be so bad.” I said, feeling my chest tighten a little bit from the cold.

“Ma’am, I think it best if you sat in front of the fire and warm up some.” Needle said.

I wasn’t in a mood to argue with him, so I nodded, sitting on the wood planks in front of the rock fireplace. I held my hands out, embracing the warmth the fire gave off. I was thankful that the hem of my dress was long enough to cover my brightly stained shoes, since I didn’t give them back to Gerry.

The cabin was so quiet, I almost forgot there was six sets of eyes watching me. “I’m not gonna just vanish, ya know.” I said, looking over my shoulder at Jasper, Pea Eye, Dish and Needle.

“Ma’am, if ya don’t mind me asking; how’d you get up here? We’re an awful long ways from the city.” Dish said.

“One of the ladies in town said that there was a cattle ranch out here somewhere and that they might be needing a cook and care taker.” I said, looking from Dish to Captain Call.

Woodrow nodded. “Well, I suppose we’re the cattle ranch you were looking for. But we can talk this over in the morning. Boys, best move your bed things out to the barn.”

“No!” I said quickly. “Let me sleep in the barn. Don’t move your men out of their own house.”

Call looked at me for a moment, but shook his head and off they went about collecting blankets and pillows and taking them out to the barn. “You suppose you’ll be alright in here by yourself tonight?”

“You didn’t have to kick your men out of your own cabin. I could have slept in the barn just fine.” I told Woodrow, feeling as guilty for the intrusion as I had the first time.

“Nonsense.” He said, sternly. “A woman wandering around in the dark, by herself while it’s raining. Couldn’t rightly let you sleep with the horses. My boys are used to it.”

“You’re being very generous to me, Captain Call.” I said, looking up at him.

He nodded, obviously not sure what to say. “If it’s all the same to you, ma’am, I’ll be sleeping on the porch. For your safety and for that of my boys’.” He told me.

I nodded. “Of course.”

He watched me for a moment, then nodded and told the boys to leave the cabin. He was about to leave himself when he turned to me. “McCrae.” He said simply, almost as if he was asking about it.

I nodded. “It’s from my mother’s side. She didn’t have anything to do with my father after I was born. I guess it came from my great-great grandma, Augustine.”

Woodrow nodded once but looked a little bit like he’d seen a ghost. “Good night.” And he closed the door to the cabin.

I huddled by the fireplace, feeling like I was at home for the first time in a long time.

 

* * *

 

 

Captain Call, as before, agreed to let me stay on in exchange for chores being done. I did all the things I had done before; make food, wash dishes and clothes, help the boys when I could.

The men were impressed with my biscuits and I told them I learned from a lifelong friend. Newt turned a little red around the ears when he heard me say this.

Newt used every excuse he could come up with to help me with dishes or food. I asked him one day why he did it when he knew the boys would make fun of him behind his back.

He just shrugged. “I don’t care for them like I care for you.”

Needless to say, that shut me up fast.

One day, after the chores I had been done and dinner finished, Newt asked me to dance with him. I smiled. “As often as you’d like, Mr. Dobbs.” I said as he walked past the porch, onto the little dirt patch in front of the porch.

It was an evening of swapping stories and liquor. All the men looked at us oddly when we stood in the patch of dirt. Newt took my hand and set his other on my waist. I smiled up at him and he danced me in a circle.

“Where’d ya learn that, Newt?” Pea Eye called from the porch.

“A pretty girl taught me a long time ago.” Newt told Pea, even though he never took his eyes off me.

“She sounds like quite a gal.” I told him quietly.

“She is.” He said with a smile. He stopped us and went to sit on the porch with the other boys.

“Dish, will you dance with me?” I asked, holding my hand out to him.

He suddenly looked mighty embarrassed. “I don’t, I don’t know how to dance.” He said, stumbling a bit.

“I’d bet money I don’t have that you dance better than me.” I said. He just sat there, making excuses. I shook my head at him. “Captain, what about you?” I asked, looking at him in the rocking chair.

He looked a bit surprised. “Oh, I suppose. Wouldn’t do to turn down a dance with a pretty lady.” He said, standing and walking down the three steps to the dirt patch.

I smiled at him as he led me. “Where’d you learn to dance, Captain?” Of course, he’d told me before, in another time. But I liked the story and wanted to hear it again.

“Gus and I had to learn for a Governor’s Ball when we were rangers.” He said simply, looking curiously at me. “Before we had on Pea and Jake and Deets, of course.”

I smiled. “Did you dance with some pretty girls?”

“I believe so, if I remember correctly.” He said, with a bit of a smile.

After a pass or two, the Captain slowed us to a stop and took a bow. I gave him a small curtsy and he replanted himself in the chair. I looked at Dish. “I know you can dance so you don’t got one reason to turn me down.”

“I don’t know what you’re talkin’ ‘bout.” Dish said, trying to play dumb.

“Dish Boggett, are you going to lie right to my face?” I asked.

“Well, no ma’am.” He said slowly, standing up and coming to stand in front of me.  He sighed, taking my hands and I smiled. He led me gracefully around our little dirt patch.

“Thank you.” I told him quietly.

“I don’t see how you coulda known I could dance.” He said, seeming a little bit annoyed at me.

I smiled. “Call it an educated guess.”

He shook his head, but seemed content to dance me in a circle five or six times. When we finally stopped, the stars were bright above us and the waxing moon gave enough light to see the lake and hills around us. “It’s awful pretty out here at night.” I said, more to myself.

Woodrow decided it was bedtime and sent the men on their way as he was still sleeping on the porch. I went inside and stoked the fire up.


	10. The One about Breaking Horses

I woke early to start breakfast. I took a cup of coffee out to Woodrow, who sat watching the sun come up. He seemed startled that I was up so early, but I just went back inside to work on breakfast. He came in a few minutes later and sat at the table.

“Augustus was quite a wild man, if you come to think of it.” Call said out of the blue after a minute or so.

I turned to him. “I don’t believe we’ve had the pleasure of meeting.”

He shook his head. “I suppose not, since he’s buried in Texas.”

I remembered the story Newt told me about Captain Call hauling his old friend back to Texas to be buried. “You were close then, with this Augustus?”

He nodded for a moment, then it was quiet for a bit. “Augustus McCrae was my friend for more years than I’d bother counting.”

I looked at Captain Call. “Augustus McCrae.” I said, rolling the name around.

He nodded. “On my trip back from Texas, I ran into a man who said there was a child in Mexico with Augustus’ name.”

I remembered very distantly that one of my great-grandmothers had been Mexican, but it was so watered down through the years, I had barely any Mexican in me at all. “He never met his daughter?”

Woodrow shook his head. “Gus and I raised Newt. I reckon if he’d known he’d been the father, he would have lived a happy life in Mexico.”

I nodded. “Why are you telling me this story, Captain? You don’t seem like much of a story teller.”

He was quiet for a while as I put in the biscuits in the fire. “I’ll be plain with you Miss McCrae. I don’t rightly believe you are who you say you are.”

I thought about it for a moment as I started on the meat. “I believe that to be your right, Captain.”

“You’re not from around here and you didn’t come to be no caretaker.” He said.

I thought about how I had told him the first time. Maybe that was the best route, instead of explaining that I’d lived with them almost two weeks, left and came back with none of them remembering me but Newt. “Well, Captain, you’re right. I’m not from around here. I’ve never been to Montana before. A few days ago, I was working at a lawyer’s office. That same night, I was at my apartment in Denver, with my roommate.  Today, I’m in Montana on a cattle ranch.” I said with a shrug. “I don’t know how I got here. I just know I don’t want to go back.”

He looked over at me. “Ma’am, I ain’t a man to call a lady a liar. But I believe you about as far as I can throw you.”

I smiled. “That’s understandable.” I told him, thinking. “When I left Denver a few days ago, the year was 2013.” I told him, trying to gauge his reaction as I looked over at him.

He sat still for a moment, mimicking a statue. Then slowly turned his head to look at me. “That ain’t rightly possible, seeing as its 1877 now.”

I shrugged. “I know that. But that’s what happened.” I said, walking around the table and pulling up the hem of my dress just enough to show off my neon colored flats. “I brought these with me, as I didn’t have any plain shoes.”

He looked a bit disbelieving, but then his expression slowly softened. “Time travel, eh?” He said, sipping his coffee.

“I don’t know how it works, or how to get back, so I expect I’ll try to make the best of what I’m given while I’m here.” I told him, finishing up the meat.

Call said nothing else as the boys started filing in, grabbing their coffee and sitting down.  I pulled the biscuits out of the fire and the day went on normally.

About midafternoon, I went to look out the window to only see Pea Eye and Newt working in the lot with the horses. Newt was trying to break one of the mares in the herd and Pea Eye was watching, yelling advice every once in a while.

I left the rag on the table and went to watch. I stood next to Pea as Newt kept hold of the reins he’d gotten on the mare. He reminded me of the rodeo that played on the TVs at Figgy McGee’s, the pub down the block from my apartment in Denver.

Newt could have long outlasted any other cowboy on TV. I was almost mesmerized by watching Newt that I almost forgot what I came out there for. “Pea, have you seen the other guys?” I asked, looking around for them.

“No ma’am. Captain said they was going for a ride and it was best for us to stay and try to get this mare to break.” Pea said as Newt got thrown from the horse.

I cringed, covering my mouth. I was about to ask if he was ok when he stood up and dusted himself off, simply looking annoyed at the mare. But he climbed back on and held on tightly, being tossed around the pen on the leather saddle.

“How long’s he been at this?” I asked Pea.

“’Bout a few hours, I’d reckon.” He said, watching Newt.

Newt got thrown once more before he came to sit on the fence. He’d managed to get the saddle off the mare and set it on the fence.

“Are you alright?” I asked, as he climbed to sit on the top rung of the fence.

He nodded. “Scrapped my elbow a bit. Nothing bad.” He said, panting a bit and pulling up his sleeve to reveal the bloody scrape.

“You and Pea should come inside for a rest. You’ve been workin’ awful hard. I’ll even get you some cool water.” I said, patting Newt’s leg as I turned and walked away. I got the bucket off the porch and went to get some cool water out of the lake.

About dinner time, Captain Call, Needle and Dish rode back into camp. They put their horses up in the stable and came in to see Pea, Newt and I sitting at the table.

“Been loafin’ around I see.” Call said, but I could tell he was just getting in a good jest.

“I think I almost got her broke, Captain. I’ll try again tomorrow.” Newt said, taking a glance up at the Captain.

“Supper ‘bout ready then?” Call asked as Needle and Dish took off their hats.

“Yes sir. I just wasn’t sure when you’d be back. Beans are done and the biscuits should be about done too.” I said, standing to check on them. Call nodded and sat down at the table with the other boys. “What took you so far from home?” I asked, off-handedly. There was obviously a reason the three had gone off for a bit and it was driving me crazy that I didn’t know.

“Dish told me there was bandits in the area. I figured we best keep an eye out. I supposed Pea and Newt could get by just fine.” He said, in a way that made me think he wasn’t telling the whole truth.

I remembered when Newt and Dish took me on the horseback ride and we met with the four bandits while we were hunting. “Oh. Best to keep them away from the stock.”

“I suppose we’ll be out at it for a couple days.” Call said as he dished himself some beans.

I nodded, not feeling it was necessary to call him out.

The boys and I ate in silence, then they retired to the porch while I finished cleaning up. Without fail though, every evening, Newt would ask if I’d like help with anything. Dishes was the only real chore I had after dinner, so he carried the wash bucket down to the lake for me and we talked while I washed the dishes.

Tonight though, he sat silently, deep in thought. The silence, though not unwelcome, made me feel uncomfortable this evening.

“Have you ever had a girlfriend, Newt?” I asked, letting my words slip. Around the other men, I watched how I worded things, because they’d look at me funny when I said ‘that’s awesome’ instead of ‘that’s neat.’ But around Newt, it didn’t bother me to just talk how I normally had before.

He looked at me. “I’ve had a friend that’s a girl before, if that’s what you mean.”

I was usually explaining words to Newt, not because he was stupid or anything; he was actually pretty smart. But because my terms for things were different then his. I thought about it for a moment. “Like, a long term commitment with a girl. Courting.” I said, coming up with the word at the last moment.

He smiled. “Nah. Not me. Ain’t got much time for girls on a cattle ranch, usually.” He said ‘usually’ with a tone of voice I couldn’t put my finger on.

“Do you regret it? Moving up here and not being able to have time for a girl?” I asked as I rinsed off a plate and stacked it in the wash bucket.

Newt smiled. “Captain Call and Mr. Gus was the closest thing I had to a pa. I couldn’t imagine not coming with ‘em.” He said, glancing over at me. “ ’Sides, I got all the time for the only girl that means anything.”

I blushed, feeling the warmth of my cheeks spread to my ears and neck. “You’re too good to me, Newt Dobbs.”

This made him smile, as he laid back in the grass with his hands behind his head. “I ain’t never gonna be too good to ya.”

I shook my head at him.

“So what’s the guy version of a girlfriend? Ya ever have one of them?” He asked, looking up at me with those big brown eyes.

“A boyfriend. Yeah, I’ve had a couple of them.” I told him.

“Tell me about them.” He said, squirming around in the grass until his head laid near my leg.

“One was named David. He was nice, but never wanted to leave his house. One was named Joseph. He was mean and he was the one that hit me. Then there was Alex. He was the one that called me a whore.” I said, stacking another clean plate in the tub.

Newt was quiet for a minute. “The Captain told me that before I was born Mr. Gus was married twice. Once to a lady for a couple years and she died. Then again to another lady and she died after about a year of marriage. But Captain Call told me Gus and his second wife had been acquainted for only a week ‘fore they got married.”

“The lady at the dress store said she met her husband when he came out of the saloon one night and tripped her. The next day he came and apologized. She said they got married the next Sunday.” I told Newt.

Newt was quiet for another set of minutes and I was starting to realize this was the only way he could form a response. If you rushed him for an answer, you were sure to not get one. “You suppose it’s ok for people to get married so soon?” He asked, looking up at me. “Or real young?”

I smiled at him, wiping my hand on my apron before stroking his hair as he closed his eyes. “Mr. Dobbs, if I do remember correctly. We’ve both time traveled.” I said, leaning over him to kiss him on the forehead. “I believe anything is possible.”

He smiled up at me, like a dog that just got a biscuit. “Suppose it’s about time to go back to town and get you some new clothes.”

I shrugged. I didn’t care and I was sure Newt knew that. I stacked the dishes in the bucket and stood up. Before I could pick up the bucket, Newt was on his feet and lifting it off the ground. I just looked up at him and shook my head. “You’re an interesting man, Newt Dobbs.” I told him as I took his elbow and we walked up the hill.

When we rounded the house, I let go of Newt’s arm. No reason for him to be teased more than he already was.

“Captain, suppose we could go into town tomorrow and get goods?” Newt asked when we got closer to the porch.

Captain Call thought about it for a minute, blowing smoke out of his lungs. “Suppose so. We need some nails and bacon, I reckon.” He said, glancing at me for confirmation.

“Uh, yeah. We’ve got probably enough for three more days at best.” I told him, trying to figure it out in my head.

He nodded. “Suppose you’ll need a good rest tonight then. Needle will go with ya.” He said, taking another drag from his smoke.

“And Captain,” Newt started. “Suppose I could buy the miss a new dress, with my wages?”

Captain Call took a moment to think through his answer and I wondered if that was where Newt got his habit from.

“Newt, now that’s just silly talk. I don’t need nothin’ but bacon to cook for you boys.” I said, looking up at him. I hoped I wouldn’t upset him when I said it; I still wasn’t entirely sure in my place as a woman on a cattle ranch. But I didn’t need new dresses and he didn’t need to be spending his hard earned money on me.

“Miss McCrae is right. You best keep your money, Newt.” The Captain said and Newt was about to argue. “I’ll buy the miss a new dress and that can be her wages for the month.” He said, looking at me to see if I had any qualms.

“See, that’s fair terms.” I said, taking the bucket of dishes from Newt and walking up the stairs. I could hear Newt argue with Call from the porch, but I zoned them out a little bit by humming a familiar song to myself.

“Why won’t you let me buy you nothin’?” Newt asked suddenly, making me turn around. I hadn’t even heard him come in the cabin, or close the door.

As soon as I looked at him, I could tell I’d hurt his feelings. “Oh, Newt. I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to offend you.” I said, pausing in my task. “I just meant I think it’s silly for you to be buying me things I don’t need when you worked hard for that money.”

He still looked offended as he walked over to lean on the table, still watching me. “But what if I wanna?”

In all honesty, I hadn’t thought anything about if he wanted for no reason to buy me things. I thought for just a second, trying to phrase my reply carefully. “Every time a guy has bought me something, they’ve wanted something in return. I didn’t want it to be like that with us. I want you to be with me because you like being with me. Not because you expect things from me.”

He stood there, just watching me and I could almost see the wheels in his head working. “I wanted to buy you the dress to show you how much I like bein’ with you.” He said.

I gave him a sad smile. “I’m sorry for turning down your offer so quickly. I’d love a new dress and if you want to buy me one, then I will graciously accept it with a smile.” I told him.

He smiled a little bit. “Well, I’m much obliged.”

I smiled at him and shook my head as I went back to doing dishes.

“Are you going to get the red one again?” He asked me.

I glanced over at him. “The thing about time travel is that every time you do it, something changes. The first time I came through, I was wearing my street clothes. This time, I came through in the dress. So because that little thing changed, everything else has changed. Even if there’s a similar outcome, it’s all different. Does that make sense?” I asked him.

Newt nodded.

“But, if the dress lady has the red one, I’ll get it just for you.” I said with a smile.

He smiled real big then nodded and returned to the porch.


	11. The One with the Letter

It took a few more minutes, picking up after dinner before I followed Newt out, when I was done with dishes. I sat on the bottom step, looking up at the stars as Pea and Call remembered a time when they fought Comanches along the Brazos River in Texas.

The Captain was recalling how they’d been on a scouting trip, looking for their old captain, Scull, when the Great Comanche Raid of the 1850’s happened. Pea was recalling how silly he thought the trip was, when they’d heard the Captain had gone done to Mexico.

The story was fairly intriguing and the most interesting part was that it’d actually happened to them; you weren’t just hearing about it on TV or in a book.

About the time I thought I might want to go to bed, Pea asked me for a story, as I was the only one who hadn’t contributed to the evening’s entertainment. The Captain and Pea told us of the Great Comanche Raid. Dish told us about how he ran cattle for a living before he hooked up with the Hat Creek outfit and decided Montana would be nice.

Jasper gave a made up story about traveling Georgia and Alabama looking for the love of his life before wandering onto the Hat Creek Co. in Texas. Needle told a heartbreaking tale of woe; he loved a gal named Sally and told her often, but a rich man came into town and swept her off to St. Louis, never to be seen again. He claimed he’d never loved another woman.

I liked Newt’s story about the blue pigs and Gus McCrae. But I had nothing to add onto it. I hadn’t done anything interesting, except time travel and that wasn’t really an after dinner conversation, as it was one you would have thought to have with bars between the parties.

The boys goaded me until I twisted the story of Newt and Dish taking me out riding, as technically, it hadn’t happened yet. I gave other names to the two boys, but I could tell Newt knew what I was talking about.

I told them how I didn’t know much about horses and a friend talked me into taking a ride with them while they hunted up dinner. I hadn’t done too bad I thought, when half way through, we met four bandits. Two were white, one was Mexican and one was an Indian, all traveling together.

After a few snide comments directed at me, the guys I rode with finally scared them off and the guy leading the ride had shot a deer with his rifle so fast, I barely had time to realize he’d moved before he was off his horse and skinning the thing.

“Sounds like a quick draw, if I ever heard one.” Pea said.

Jasper rolled his eyes. “Ain’t nobody can draw so fast you can’t see ‘em.”

“What happened to them bandits?” Dish asked.

“I don’t know. I never saw them again thankfully. The guys I was with were pretty scary, so I figured that was the reason they stayed away.” I said, pulling something out of a hat.

“I reckon it’s time to get to bed. Needle, you’ll be goin’ with the Miss and Newt into town.” Call told the men.

Needle nodded, giving a short ‘yes sir,’ before heading to the barn with Pea Eye, Jasper and Dish. Newt lingered near me, despite the fact Captain Call sat not five feet from us.

“Suppose I best make sure that fire ain’t gone out.” Woodrow said, surprising me, as he stood and went into the cabin to, honest to God, check the fire.

With Woodrow’s back turned, Newt gave me a quick kiss that I had to make sure not to fall head first into. Newt was careful to only kiss me when he knew no one was around. This was a very rare occurrence that he was kissing me while the Captain was within hearing range; as he’d left the door open a crack.

“Goodnight, Miss Selene.” Newt said with a smile as he turned towards the barn. I just stood there watching him walk away.

“Good kid, that boy.” Captain Call said a minute later, about the time Newt was swallowed by the wood beast of a stable.

“I reckon I’d agree, Captain.” I said.

He just stood there in the doorjamb for a moment and I felt like he was arranging his thoughts. “I believe he intends to marry you.”

His comment took me off guard, so I just kind of stood there for a second. “Newt?” I asked, dumbstruck. I mean, he’d mentioned marriage once or twice before, but I didn’t know he’d actually meant it.

“If he ain’t intending to, he best ought to.” The Captain said, puzzling me further.

“You think I should marry Newt?” I asked, watching as he sat in the rocker.

“I didn’t say that. I said he ought to marry you.” He said.

I was quiet for an instant. “Captain, last I checked, it’s about the same thing.”

He nodded slightly and lit a smoke. “Sometimes. Not always.”

I just looked up at him, wondering how an enigma like Captain Call ended up here. “Do you always talk in riddles when you want to say something indirectly?”

He smiled from behind his smoke. “Don’t make much difference if you understand the riddle, does it?”

I smiled and shook my head, wondering if I did actually understand the riddle, or if he’d confused me into thinking I had. “Good night, Captain Call. Don’t stay up too late.” I told him, retreating up the three steps and across the porch to close the door of the cabin.

For a long while, I sat in front of the fireplace, wondering over Captain Call’s comments. I couldn’t figure out what he was talking about. I knew Newt took a shine to me; if he hadn’t, he obviously wouldn’t be kissing me. But I didn’t think I was the kind of girl you married and settled down with. Then again, I’d never been married or settled down.

I stood quickly, remembering I had yet to write a letter to Gerry. I scrounged in the cabinet for a moment before I came up with a piece of paper and a fountain pen. I’d never wrote with a fountain pen, so I tore off a corner to practice with. After a minute or two, I felt I could successfully use the instrument.

I started writing out the note to Gerry.

_Dear Gerry, it’s been almost a week since I’ve come back. Captain Call told me his old partner’s name was Augustus McCrae and it makes me wonder, since my great-great grandmother’s name was Augustine. I’m sure it’s just a coincidence._

_I wish you could meet the Captain. He’s not a very likeable man, but he’s a good man. He does what he has to, to keep the ranch running smoothly. We’re going into town tomorrow to get some goods and Newt says he wants to buy me a new dress._

_He got awful upset when I told him he didn’t need to. But he says he wants to, so I suppose if he wants to buy me new clothes, I’ll let him._

_Captain Call says Newt should marry me. I’m kind of confused. I mean, I like Newt of course. But I don’t know. I never thought about marriage before. I always thought it’d be you and me until you got married and had kids of your own, then I’d be a really cool aunt. Marriage seems like a tricky thing and if Newt does want to marry me, I’d hate to mess it up._

_And don’t you shake your head at me, because I know you are._

_I know you don’t have a way of replying back to me. I just wish you could tell me what you think about it. Should I say yes, if he even does ask? I think I really love him, Gerry. He makes me happy and I don’t even remember the last time I was this happy._

I paused in my writing to smile a little bit.

_I guess I’ll write you again in a few days. I love and miss you so much. I hope you are doing well._

Then I signed it and folded it in fourths. I set it on top of the cupboard above the wood range, underneath the coffee pot so none of the guys would find it and read it.  I went back to lay in front of the fireplace and thought of Newt on horseback and Gerry running around a fashion studio with a measuring tape around his neck flashed through my head.

 

* * *

 

 

I pulled the blanket closer to me, trying to chase the cold from my body. I shivered and opened my eyes to see the fire close to dying. I hadn’t added wood after I wrote the letter to Gerry. Pulling the blanket around my shoulders, I put two hunks of wood on top of the bright red bed of coals. I leaned forward and blew gently until one of the coals caught fire from the wood.

But the cold from the spring had already crept into the cabin and refused to release it from its clutches. I shivered again as I got up and started coffee. When that was done, I took a cup out of Woodrow, where he sat watching the sun come up.

I went about frying the bacon and then I started the biscuits and eggs. When the boys came into the cabin, I still had a chill hanging in the air. I sat and ate breakfast with the boys. It was about halfway through, when Jasper stood up to get another cup of coffee that I remembered my letter to Gerry had been underneath the coffee pot.

I watched him carefully, then saw as the piece of paper on the shelf caught his eye. He picked it up and looked confused, then he opened it and read a few lines to himself. Or maybe he couldn’t read it. Maybe he was trying to. But my heart raced and I knew if he decided to read it out loud, I wouldn’t be able to stay in the cabin.

He looked up at me with a cruel smile. “Dear Gerry, it’s been almost a week since I’ve come back. Captain Call told me his old partner’s name was Augustus McCrae…” My words through Jasper Fant’s mouth made me sick.

I pushed my chair away from the table and left the cabin. I couldn’t be in the company of the men if Jasper read the whole thing out loud to them all. Especially the part about Newt and marriage. What would Newt think of me? What if Captain Call decided I was too much trouble and told me to just move on?

The sound of my own heavy breathing broke through my thoughts. I looked around and I was nearly halfway around the lake. I stopped and just sat on the dew dampened ground.  I looked out at the lake that was shrouded in fog from the early morning, but I didn’t actually see it. I saw Gerry, sitting cross legged in front of me with a tub of popcorn and a smile.

“Are you really going to let them drive you away? Away from your true love?” I could hear his voice whisper in the slight breeze.

“Gerry, I’ve never had anybody read my things like that. That’s why I never kept a journal. If someone got ahold of it, I’d never be able to live it down. I just wanted to write you a letter.” I said, realizing my face was wet. I wasn’t sure when I’d stated crying, but I took the sleeve of my shirt and wiped my eyes.

When I looked up, Newt stood not ten feet from me. I looked up at him, but I couldn’t meet his eyes. I didn’t want to see whatever embarrassment or neglect he was feeling.

“Did he read the whole thing?” I asked, looking out at the lake again.

Newt came and sat next to me. “No.” He said, handing the letter back to me. “But I did.”

I felt like my heart literally stopped working. “Newt, I didn’t mean it like that. I mean, I’m nervous and the whole thing is scary, but I mean, if you want to get married, I can’t think of any reason to not get married. And I love it here, I do. We wouldn’t need to move or anything. I mean, we’d need our own place and that. But I could still cook and clean and stuff and you could work with the horses and…”

He took my hand and kissed it gently, leaning into me. “You’re not ready. That’s ok.”

I waited, wondering if he was going to add on to his five word comment that stopped my rant. “But you are ready.”

He smiled over at me. “Don’t mean nothin’ if you aren’t. And that’s ok. I’ll wait forever.”

I looked at him, surprised by his answer. “Well I suppose forever isn’t necessary.”

Newt smiled at me, leaning to touch his forehead to mine. “If that’s what it meant, I’d wait forever.”

I took a deep breath and looked up at him. “You’re the sweetest man I’ve ever met.”

He smiled. “You ready to go into town? We’ll get you a couple new dresses.” He told me, standing up and helping me.

Letter in hand, I stood next to him, linking my arm with his. “How far did he read?” I asked him.

Newt thought about it for a minute. “Something about a grandmother.”

I nodded. “I was wondering if your Gus was my great grandfather of some sort.”

He nodded. “Same last name. Probably.” He said, walking me back to the cabin. When we got back to the cabin, Needle had set up the wagon and saddled his horse. “We gotta go to the post office too.” Newt told Needle, who nodded.

“Not a problem.” He said, giving me a little bit of a hat tip.

When I saw Jasper walking towards me with his head down, I felt both anger and embarrassment. When an apology stumbled from his mouth, I shook my head and climbed into the seat.

“What?” Jasper asked, his temper flaring a little bit.

I just shook my head in disbelief. “You read a private document, that was neither addressed to you nor contained anything about you and you feel a simple ‘I’m sorry’ is going to release the grudge I now hold against you? No sir. No sir.” I said, looking at the horses in front of the wagon.

And then I remembered how Jasper and I had never had any of our previous conversations. So I gave him a hard look in the eye. “I understand that you get away with being indirectly rude to people. That’s fine. But from this point forward, if you do or say anything that I deem inappropriate, I will see to it that you don’t enjoy the rest of your time at the Hat Creek Cattle Company.”

Jasper looked extremely nervous. “You can’t, you can’t do that. Captain Call will make you collect your wages.”

“Jasper, there’s more to life than what you get paid. If Captain Call told me he couldn’t pay me anymore, then I’d probably still stick around.” I told him as Newt climbed onto the seat next to me. “As for you, I’ll still upset with you. So if you’ll kindly back away from the wagon, we’ll be on our way.”

He looked like a kicked dog as he took a step back. Newt shook the reins and the horses started the trek to town. By the time we’d crested the hill above the Hat Creek outfit, Newt leaned into me a bit. I leaned back, putting my head on his shoulder. “Jasper makes me mad.”

“Jasper does that.” He said, glancing over at me.

“Why do you guys keep him around?” I asked harshly.

Newt just gave me a little smile. “Because he’s family.”

My anger evaporated quickly; leaving behind a mild irritation. “I just don’t like how he treats me.” I told him.

Newt shook his head. “Me neither. I’ll have a talk with him when we get home.”

I nodded and we continued on our way.


	12. The One about Breaking Things

A few hours later, we got to town. Newt parked the wagon in front of the general store and told Needle we’d be back after a while. I linked my arm with Newt’s and he walked me down the road until we came to the same little dress shop we’d been at before.

“Good morning. What can I help with?” The lady behind the counter, Angelica, said.

“I’d like to buy the miss a dress, if she’ll let me.” Newt said, glancing at me.

“And I told you I’d graciously accept.” I told him, to which he nodded.

“Oh, you’re too cute.” She said, coming around the counter and taking three different measurements. “You have lovely proportions, dear. Let’s just see what we have in your size.” She said, sweeping away to the far wall to go through a rack.

Newt sat with his fingers crossed and I looked at him oddly. What was he crossing his fingers for? But when she came back from the rack, I understood. He was excited for the red dress that Angelica had in her hands.

She showed me into the little dressing room behind the counter. “Would you like help with getting this old thing off?” She asked, seeing how dirty the dress was.

“Yes, please. I played hell just getting it on.” I said, remembering I’d told her that last time.

She smiled at me, like she’d heard that a few times. “I’m glad the sir is buying you a dress. If you’d come in here looking like this without him, I’d have bought you one.” She said, helping me out of it. “I’m Angelica, by the way.”

“Selene.” I said with a small smile. I said nothing more as she helped me into the same yellow dress. I told her I thought it washed me out a bit. After a moment’s consideration, she agreed and pulled the garment off me. She then slid a midnight blue dress over my head and I looked at it in the mirror. It was gorgeous in a flattering way, without being revealing.

I pulled back the curtain and took a breath as I came around the counter to look at Newt. He stood up, looking me over. Slowly, his eyes moved up to meet mine and I did a little twirl for him. “What do you think?” I asked, since he hadn’t said anything.

“Gorgeous, ma’am.” He said, fingering his hat.

I smiled. “You really think so?” He nodded, looking a little stunned. I walked over to him and gave him a kiss on the cheek before returning to stand next to Angelica in the dressing room.

“He’s a cute boy. How long have you been together?” She asked.

I thought about it for a moment while she helped me put on the red dress. “About two weeks now, I suppose.”

She smiled. “I married my husband after a week’s acquaintance. My mother was horrified, of course. But he was a gentlemen, despite how we met.”

I smiled. “How did you meet?” I asked, despite the fact I knew the answer already.

“He came out of the saloon one night while I was on my way home and he tripped me. I was terribly mad at him, but he came and apologized the next day.” Angelica smiled. “We’ve been married nearly fifteen years now.”

“That’s an awful long time.” I told her. “You still like him I assume?”

She smiled. “He can be hardheaded in his opinions, but there’s not a man on the planet I’d rather be with.”

I thought about it for a moment while she finished helping me. “Did you know he was the one when you met?” I asked, looking at her.

Angelica smiled. “Not when we first met. But it takes a man a lot of courage to apologize to a woman; especially for something he didn’t remember doing. When he apologized, I knew we’d be married before the week was out.”

I just stood there, looking at the dress in the mirror, thinking.

“Do you not like the dress?” She asked.

“No, no. I love the dress. I’m sorry. My nerves are all shot.” I said with a smile. “I think Newt plans to marry me. Is it bad if I don’t know whether I’d want to marry him?” I asked, turning to her.

She smiled at me. “Love is not a complicated thing. People make it complicated. If you love him, marry him. If you do not, then don’t. Don’t make it difficult for both of you by throwing in excuses for one thing or another.” She said, setting her hand on my shoulder.

I nodded. “I should show Newt.” I told her, pulling back the curtain. I stopped at the end of the counter, seeing Newt talking with two other men, both in suits. He paused his conversation to look over at me, before he excused himself from the two men. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to interrupt.” I told him.

He smiled, ignoring my comment. “I adore you in that dress, Miss McCrae.”

I blushed a little bit. “Do you really? You’re not just saying that?” I asked him.

“No ma’am, I’m not.” He said, still smiling a bit.

“Is it alright if I get this one and the blue one? I really like them both.” I said, watching his reaction carefully.

“Anything for the lady.” He told me.

“You’re just a darling, Mr. Dobbs. I’ll let you get back.” I told him, walking back around the counter.

“How about you wear this blue one out of the store and then you can get this green one washed? It’s quite a sight.” She told me.

I smiled. “Would that be ok? I’d love to, if it’s alright.”

She smiled and gave me a little hug. “You’re a little darling. And it’s none of my business,” She said, while helping me out of the red fabric. “But that Newt boy is one lucky kid if he does get your hand. You’re a dear to him and I can imagine he’s the same to you.”

“Oh, he’s just the best. He found me out in the woods when I got all turned around and my horse ran off. If not for Newt, I don’t know where I’d be at all.” I told her as I finished putting on the blue dress.

She gave me a grin as she collected the red dress, leaving the yellow one hanging. “Do what feels right and everything else will follow.” She said, holding the curtain open for me. I went back around the counter as Newt was still talking with the two men.

“That’s quite a dress on you, ma’am.” One of the suited men said.

I looked over and smiled. “Well, thank you sir.” I told him.

“Miss McCrae, these men own land to the east of us. Neighbors, I suppose.” Newt said.

“Miles Staton, ma’am. This is my partner, Charles Black.” The taller of the two men said.

“Nice to meet you both. Selene McCrae.” I told them and they seemed to look at me for a moment.

“Ma’am, if I may. Are you by chance any relation to that of Captain Augustus McCrae of the Texas Rangers?” Charles asked me.

“Um. I’ve heard the name a great many times, but no direct relation that I’m aware of.” I said.

“Well, Mr. Dobbs, we best get back out to the ranch. It was a pleasure meeting you, Miss McCrae.” Miles said, tipping his hat and following his partner out the door.

“Why do they seem so familiar?” I asked Newt.

He thought for a moment. “You haven’t met them before that I’m aware of.”

I brushed off the thought and when I turned back around, a black cowboy hat with a loose brim sat on top of the two dress boxes; just like the one Newt was playing with. “What’s this for?” I asked, picking up the hat.

“Humor me?” She asked with an excitement I couldn’t turn down.

I sighed and slipped the hat onto my head, then turned to Newt, who nodded. “Yeah?” I asked. “Yeah.” He confirmed. I smiled and leaned into him a bit. He pulled out a different money bag then he’d had the last time and I knew he was paying for them with his own money. “Have I ever told you how much I appreciate you?” I asked him as Angelica rang up the order.

He glanced over at me with a smile. “Don’t suppose so.”

“Well, I very much appreciate you, Mr. Dobbs.” I told him.

“Well, I very much appreciate you, Miss McCrae.” He told me with a smile as he paid the lady.

“Please, please, please,” Angelica begged. “Wash this garment before you put it on again. It’s a sight.” She told me, putting it in its own box.

I smiled at her. “I will indeed.” I told her as I made a grab for the boxes. Newt was faster. In the time I’d leaned over the counter, he’d dropped the money bag in his pocket and grabbed both boxes. I couldn’t help but smile. “Newt Dobbs, you will never stop surprising me.”

“Good. Best to keep you on your toes.” He told me, holding the boxes with one hand as he held the door open with the other.

“Thank you so much, Angelica.” I told her one last time before she waved to us as we left. “Thank you, Newt.” I told him.

“Ain’t nothin’.” He told me with a smile.

I got quite a few looks on the way back to the wagon. It seemed to make Newt a bit surly, but it didn’t mean anything to me. Needle came out of the store as Newt set the dresses in the back of the wagon. Needle gave a low whistle when his eyes fell on me. I gave him a little twirl, making the skirt fly out a little. “Do you like it?” I asked him.

“I’ll be honest ma’am. If Newt don’t intend to marry you soon, I just might have to do it myself.” He said with a teasing smile.

“I don’t suppose that’d make Newt too happy.” I said, even though Newt was smiling from the joke.

“Did I miss anything?” Needle asked, directing his attention to Newt.

“Bacon.” I said over my shoulder as I watched a few people come out of the saloon.

“How did she know that?” Needle tried to whisper to Newt, who just shrugged.

“I’ll be right back. Stay away from those two men before.” He told me.

I just looked at him. “It’s not as if I asked them to come over and harass me.” I told him.

He nodded. “Just watch out. If they come back, just get off the wagon and come find me.” He said.

I nodded and he went into the store with Needle. I sat there for a few minutes, watching people move up and down the street. About three businesses up, I saw the two men from before, the ones that had called me a whore. Feeling a little bit of panic, I tried to calm myself as I jumped out of the wagon. I refused to let myself look up the street as I walked inside the store.

Newt looked up at me, slightly alarmed.

“They’re coming down the street and they look mad.” I said, as quietly as I could, since he wasn’t done with his transaction.

“Needle, can ya go stand by the wagon for me?” Newt asked, looking over at Needle.

He looked between us oddly, but then nodded. “Sure boss.” He said, returning to stand in the back of the wagon off the loading dock.

I stood close to Newt with my back to the loading deck. I cringed when I heard their voices. They were throwing insults at Needle, who brushed them off and tried to get them to just move along. Newt finished paying. “Newt, they’re looking for a fight. Please don’t give it to them.” I said, looking up at him.

His jaw was set. He wasn’t going to promise something he couldn’t keep, so he walked over to the two men and I stood near the counter. “You boys best move along, if you’re movin’ along.” Newt said.

“Why would we do that?” The shorter one asked.

“We’ll move right along if we can have your little pretty there.” The taller one said, pointing to me.

Without thinking about it, I took a step back.

“No, you can just move along down the road and leave us be.” Needle told them both sternly.

“I ain’t goin’ nowhere without the whore.” The taller one said, taking two steps towards me.

Newt moved in front of him and threw his fist so hard, there was a crunching noise. I hoped it was the other guy’s face, not Newt’s hand. Needle took one shot at the shorter one, who came towards him, and he just keeled over.

“Newt. Oh my god. Are you alright? Tell me that was his face, not your hand?” I said, rushing over to him.

He gave a nervous chuckle and I saw he was holding his right hand in his left, protecting it. “Would ya believe it was both?” He asked, trying to play down the situation.

“Needle, we’ve got to get him to the doctor. He broke his knuckles.” I told him.

“You take him to the Doc’s and I’ll pull the buggy around. All the way at the end of the road.” Needle said, pointing past the dress shop.

“Oh Newt.” I said, putting my arm on his as we walked.

“How do you know my knuckles are broke?” He asked, wincing when he moved too much.

“It hurts to move your hand and you look pale.” I told him, watching carefully for the sign for the Doctor’s Office.

“But that don’t tell me how you know. You done it before?” He asked.

I shook my head as I opened the door for him.

“What can I do for you two?” The doctor asked.

“Doc, he broke his knuckles in a fight just moments ago.” I told the man. “Can ya patch him up?”

The doctor sat Newt down on a bed and pulled a chair close. Newt clenched his teeth and groaned when the doc tried to even move his hand. I leaned over Newt and pulled the money bag out of his pocket.

“Where are you going?” He asked, looking pale and panicked.

“I’m going to give Needle a few dollars to buy you a bottle of whiskey. It’ll help the pain alright? I’ll be right back.” I said, kissing him on the forehead as I met Needle at the door. “How much is a bottle of whiskey?” I asked Needle.

He shrugged. “Two dollars, I suppose.”

I handed him two dollar pieces and a fifty cent piece. “This is Newt’s money, so hurry back. He’s going to need it for the pain.”

Needle nodded and took off at a jog to the saloon up the street.


	13. The One with Family Ties

Newt looked in extreme pain as I sat down on the bed next to him. “Hey handsome man. Needle will be right back with your whiskey, ok? Do you remember the first night I taught you to dance?” I asked him, trying to distract him from the pain.

He was struggling to nod, so I kept talking. “You asked for lessons. That was when Jasper was being so mean, and I told you that you could have as many lessons as you’d like. You taught me to ride Little Dipper in return.” I told him.

Newt nodded, his breathing ragged. “You looked so scared.” He choked out a nervous laugh.

“Oh, I was. I most definitely was. And you remember how you fought with Jasper when he was calling me those mean names? Just like you just did.” I said, trying to keep him occupied.

Needle barged in and handed me the change and the bottle. I pulled the cork out with my teeth and gave it to Newt. “Take a couple big swigs and it’ll lesson the pain, alright?” I asked. He nodded, pulling the bottle to his lips. “Bet you’ll think twice before hitting a guy for my honor again.” I said with a little laugh.

Newt just shook his head. “Wouldn’t think twice at all. No ma’am.”

I just smiled at him as he handed me the bottle back. I put the cork back in and set it at my feet. Then I put the change back in the bag and put it in the pocket of Newt’s jacket.

“You never told me how you knew that my hand was broken.” Newt said, sweat breaking out over his brow.

I gave him a small smile, but decided it was alright to tell him. “A man I was meant to marry. He got drunk one night and broke his knuckles against my head.” I told him, pulling up my bangs to reveal the scar on my hairline. “The ring he wore cut me open. I couldn’t afford to go to the doctor, so his cook sewed me up. That’s why the scar is ugly.”

Newt gave a cry of pain as the doctor finished adjusting his knuckles. “You broke two knuckles. It’s going to hurt for a few weeks. You best stay away from lifting anything with it.” He said, standing up and coming back with a white strip of cloth that he wrapped around Newt as a sling.

Newt’s face grew upset. “Captain ain’t gonna be happy.” He said, giving Needle a grave look.

Needle ducked his head for a moment. “No, don’t believe so. Don’t reckon he’d be mad either when you tell him what happened.”

“See. It’s a good thing we didn’t all ride in together. We’ll prop you up in the wagon and you can nap on the way back, alright?” I said with a smile.

“You don’t know how to run the horses.” Newt said, looking like he might pass out.

“No, you’re right. But Needle will help me and all we got to do is get you home and you’ll be right as rain.” I said, trying to hide the panic I was starting to feel. “Did you pull the wagon around?” I asked Needle.

He nodded, coming to Newt’s left side to help him up and out the door.

I suddenly realized the doc was still there. “How much I owe ya doc?” I asked, picking up the liquor bottle.

He smiled. “Three dollars and we’ll call it even.”

I nodded. “Give me just one minute. I have to go get your money.” I told him and he nodded. I left to find Needle pulling Newt into the back of the wagon.

“He won’t be able to sit up. You’ll have to tie him in if you want him to sit on the seat.” Needle informed me.

I nodded. “I was worried about that. Hand me his money bag so I can pay the doc.”

Needle tossed it to me and I returned to the inside. “Three dollars. Thanks so much, doc. It means a lot to me.”

“How long have you been married?” He asked.

I smiled a little. “We’re not, not just yet.” I told him and he nodded as I left. “You wanna go get your horse and I’ll wait here for you?”

Needle looked wary. “I’ll be back in just a minute.” And he took off down the road.

I stood next to the buggy, setting my hand on Newt's chest. His breathing was still ragged and it worried me how he’d gone into shock. I’d gone into shock when I broke my arm, but I just slept for an entire day and I felt better. Newt just laid there, eyes still open.

“Newt? Are you alright?” I asked, running my hand across his collar bone.

His eyes moved, like they couldn’t find something to look at, until he saw me. “Marry me?” He said.

I smiled at him, smoothing his wild hair down a little bit. “When your hand heals, ask me again.”

“But there’s a church not half a mile from here and I love you.” He said. But I saw the way his eyes moved around, like they couldn’t find something to focus on.

I stood on my tippy toes to lean over the railing of the wagon. “I love you, Newt Dobbs.” I whispered. Newt grew a big ol’ smile as Needle rode up. He looked relieved that I was still by the wagon.

Fifteen minutes and a quick lesson on how to operate the wagon, and we were on our way out of town. Driving the wagon was more nerve wrecking then riding a horse. In the wagon, I had to control two horses at once. Granted, they seemed to be under good temperament, but that didn’t mean anything.

It was a long two hours getting home, but somehow I managed to get us there. I pulled up on the reins to stop the horses and Needle showed me how to run the break.

“What in the hell happened to Newt?” Woodrow asked, as the rest of the boys joined us around the wagon.

“There were these two guys and they were talkin’ bad about Miss McCrae. Newt kept it together real well ‘til the tall one called her a whore and I swear, I never seen Newt hit somethin’ so hard.” Needle went on explaining.

“He broke two of his knuckles.” I told the Captain.

He watched me for a moment, then looked over at Needle and sighed. “Best get him inside.” He said, climbing into the wagon as him and Needle walked Newt into the house.

I followed them inside as they laid Newt in front of the fire place.

“He gonna be alright?” Woodrow asked, looking at me.

I nodded. “Knuckles take about a month to heal. Six weeks to be completely safe. Doc says to keep him from lifting anything with it.” I said, looking down at Newt.

His eyes still acted like they couldn’t focus on anything. “Did we get married yet?” He asked, looking at the fireplace.

I sighed, kneeling down next to him, so he could see me. “Will you do me a favor?”

He smiled. “Anything for the lady.”

“Close your eyes and get some sleep. You won’t hurt as bad when you wake up.” I told him.

“But then you’ll go away.” He said, setting his left hand on my face.

I smiled at him. “I’m not going anywhere. Do you want some more whiskey or are you just going to go to sleep?” I asked him.

“I think I’ll just…” He said, trailing off as his eyes closed and his breathing regulated.

I sighed, standing back up and brushing off my dress. “He’ll be fine. He’s just gone into shock. He’ll sleep the rest of today and probably most of tomorrow, then he’ll be back to acting normal.”

“Doc tell ya all that?” Woodrow asked, looking at me questioningly.

I sighed. “No, a man I was courting decided it would be the best course of action to break his knuckles against my head.” I said, pulling up my bangs to show the scar at my hairline. “Now, if you’ll excuse me, I have dresses to bring in and lunch to cook.” I said, moving around the men.

Dish met me at the door, holding my dress boxes. “That dress looks mighty nice on you, ma’am.” He said, setting the boxes on the table.

“Thank you, Dish. You’re a dear.” I told him as he left. I moved the boxes to the corner opposite the firewood before I started in on lunch. Needle and Woodrow left to finish unloading the wagon.

Right before the beans finished up, I went out to the lake and got a bucket of water. When I came back, Newt was sitting up, looking at the fire. I set the bucket on the table and went to sit next to him. He looked startled when I sat down.

“How are you feeling?” I asked.

“Like I got kicked by a horse.” He told me in a rough voice, rubbing his head. I stood up to retrieve the bottle of whiskey. I uncorked it and handed it to him. He looked unsure about the mash. I shrugged and took a swig before he relented.

“Does it help?” I asked.

He nodded, then stopped and held his head. “I got the worst headache in my life.”

“It’ll get better the more you sleep.” I said, leaning into him as he took another swallow.

“I don’t remember nothing after I hit him. Except the pain.” He said, still watching the fire.

“You were a bit silly, but nothing Needle and I couldn’t handle.” I said, kissing his cheek. “You should go back to sleep.” I said, starting to stand up.

He grabbed my arm and looked at me with a look of fear. “Can… can ya just sit with me for a little bit?” He asked.

“Let me make biscuits real fast then I’ll sit with you as long as you’d like. Is that ok?” I asked.

Newt still looked a little worried, like I might vanish if he let go of me. But he nodded. He turned around to watch me make the biscuits and place them in the pan. When I put the pan in the fire and sat back down next to him, he looked relieved as he leaned into me.

“You’re strong. This will pass quickly.” I told him, rubbing his arm.

“I never broke nothin’ before.” He told me, sounding very small.

I smiled at him, imagining him as a little boy of six or seven. “Let’s talk about something, Newt, to keep your mind off it. What would you like to talk about?” I asked him.

He was quiet for a moment, gathering his thoughts, I imagined. “Did we go to the Post Office?” He asked and I gave a little laugh.

“No sir. We got a bit sidetracked by you defending my honor.” I said, rubbing his arm.

“But then Gerry didn’t get your letter about how you aren’t sure if you want to marry me.” Newt said.

I smiled. “The more I think about it, the sillier that letter is to me.” I told him.

He was quiet for a moment. “What do ya mean?”

I thought about it. “The more I think about it, the sillier it seems that I was scared about marriage.”

He lifted his head from my shoulder to look at me. “Does that mean you’ll marry me?”

I smiled at him. “When your hand heals and you ask the Captain proper.”

“But the Captain ain’t your pa.” He said, looking slightly confused.

“No, he sure ain’t. But he’s as good as any father figure I’ve ever met. So I expect you best ask him first, like you would if my dad was here.” I said.

He thought about that for a moment. “I suppose you’re right.” He said, starting to stand up.

“Newt Dobbs, you sit down right this instant.” I said, alarmed that he was standing up.

He looked confused as he sat back down. “Why?”

“I just told you once your hand is healed.” I said, leaning into him.

After a few minutes, he fell over asleep. I checked the biscuits and pulled them off the fire. I set them on the table and stirred the beans. I wiped the sweat off my brow with the edge of my sleeve. I pulled open the cabin door and headed for the stable to find Woodrow in the corral, trying to break the horse Newt had tried to break the day before.

Call didn’t get thrown like Newt had, but he had the same determination as Newt had. After another few minutes, he just slid off the horse and ran for the fence.

“I do not envy you, Captain.” I told him as I watched the horse buck and throw its back legs. Call made no gesture to say he’d heard me at all. “Lunch is ready.” I told him, turning to walk away.

“You heard the lady.” Woodrow called to the other men, who then started for the cabin.

I checked on Newt. He was still fast asleep. I corked the whiskey he’d taken a few swigs from and set it on the shelf.

“He gonna be ok?” Dish asked quietly, sitting down.

“He’ll be fine. He’s just wore out.” I told him as the men started dishing their plates.

“You seem awful worried about him.” Needle said with a teasing tone.

I smiled at him. “I’d be barely less worried if you were layin’ there, Needle.” I said, dishing my own plate.

“You suppose you can take care of him and us at the same time?” Pea Eye asked in earnest.

“Newt won’t need too much attention. A little whiskey to numb the pain and water to keep him hydrated. I’ll keep after you boys just fine.” I said, breaking into my biscuit.

Pea seemed to take this as a decent answer, to which he went back to his lunch. When the boys were done, they trooped back outside to the barn, leaving me with Captain Call. He just kind of sat there in silence, which worried me.

“If you’re going to reprimand me for something, you should get to it. I have dishes that need washed and a broken man to look after.” I said, turning to face him.

Woodrow looked up at me, a little startled by my bluntness. “Ain’t got nothing to reprimand you for, that I know of.”

“Then what would you like to talk about?” I asked him, sitting down across from him.

He glanced over at Newt, laying asleep in front of the fire. “I gave him my horse when I took Gus back to Texas.” He told me.

“He told me. Hell Bitch is quite a name.” I commented.

He gave a bit of a smile. “Took me almost three weeks to break that horse. I never thought I’d seen Newt so scared.” But then he was quiet and I didn’t know what else to say. I knew he wanted to talk about something or say something, apparently about Newt or horses, but I couldn’t figure it out.

But then the light bulb clicked. “You… haven’t told him, have you?” I asked.

He looked up at me sharply, startling me a bit. “Haven’t told him what?” He asked, with a little bit of fire to his words. He was mild, compared to some I’d known. But I thought this would be the highlight of the Captain’s temper.

So I just set my hand on his and watched him for a moment. “He doesn’t know that you’re his father, does he?”

Woodrow looked deflated as he looked over at Newt. “Suppose Gus told him.” Call said.

“Newt said you and Gus raised him. He feels strongly for you both because of that. It isn’t my business, but I think that if you want to tell him, you should do it sooner rather than later.” I told him, squeezing his hand before I stood up and went to the wash tub. “I’m gonna go do the dishes and I’ll come back to check on Newt in a little while.”

The Captain gave me a nod as I left the cabin with the wash bin. Dish offered me help carrying the tub and I didn’t want to seem rude, so I accepted his offer. He walked with me down to the lake and set the tub down, then he kind of just stood there.

“Are you alright, Dish?” I asked him.

“Yes ma’am.” He said with a start then turned and headed up the hill back to the stable.

I shook my head as he left and I began dishes. I quietly sang to myself, finishing up pretty fast. I picked up the wash bucket and carried it back to the cabin. I almost dropped the wash tub when I saw Newt sitting on the porch. “Newt. What are you doing?” I asked, seeing him twitch his hand.

“It hurts. I thought moving it might help.” He said.

“Newt. For the love of God.” I said a little loudly, feeling frustrated all of the sudden. “The more you move it, the longer it will take to heal and the more it’ll hurt. Stop.” I told him, gently covering his fingers with my hand.

He looked up at me, unsure. “I didn’t mean to make you mad.” He said quietly, looking back down at the deck.

I dropped to my knees and set my head on the arm of the rocking chair he sat in. “I didn’t mean to get mad at you. I just want you to get better as soon as you can. And you’re sitting there making it worse.” I said, closing my eyes.

He put his good hand on my head, stroking my hair a little bit. “I’m sorry. I’ll try not to anymore.”

I sighed, stood up and took the wash bin into the house to stack the clean dishes on the cabinet. I took a deep breath and blew it out. I almost jumped when I felt a hand on my shoulder. I turned to see Newt standing there. He held his left arm open for me and I fell into him. “I’m sorry.” I whispered into his chest.

“It’s ok.” He said, kissing my forehead. “I won’t do it anymore.” He told me.


End file.
